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Poontang

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Poontang

Postby SelfSerf » Thu May 28, 2020 12:09 pm

So am not gonna sugarcoat it. Am desperate for some ass but I ain't really got any game and things are getting dark. Tbh, my mindset frightens me at times because am looking at every female as a piece of meat. It's tough not to stare and I hate perving out.

It's really a hypersexual way of being and it sucks because the urge is insane and I guess some aphrodisiacs like ashwagandha and cordyceps aren't really helping. (ramping up the T badly. good for exercise, TOO good for libido)

Reading this thread from a while back, it's kind of eerie how much the Elliot Rodgers thing fits to describe me narcissistic-personality/topic163836.html

So goddamn it's Spring and quarantine is over so there's a dazzling amount of fine women around. I also understand that it's prime-time to get with someone because ladies are probably dying to get it on as well but... :roll:

Problem is the girls I've been with have all been longterm gf's and I've basically relied on accolades to draw them in, being the extremely quiet/reserved type but sometimes odd/quirky exhibitionist/peackocking when necessary, so it seems very difficult for me to redefine my sexuality in a different setting. In my head, it works and am able to sexualize girls when detached but when it comes down to it, I know that it's not in my wiring to have sex with anyone who takes an interest in me. Girls who give off the open/slutty vibe actually turn me off quick. Since I've become heavily schizoid and sheltered (well, aren't we all nowadays) for the past few years now am easily intimidated and that is helping me in the least as I seem to creep people out easily, especially when am feeling less-than (which is the majority of the time). Deeply covert/vulnerable but also increasingly ASPD. My relations of late are almost non-existent and have been heavily dwindling so it's tough to hold up appearances. Am like a walking-talking example of toxic masculinity plus I really need to stick around capable people because I feel like a worthless piece-of-shit majority of the time.

There are moments where I sense I can still charm but the settings are not right because I don't want to lay the charm on someone at work.

Short of paying for sex (which carries with it the same invulnerability issue am sure, couldn't imagine doing that), any suggestions on what could be done?

Basically my only current thought is thinking bars/hitting the booze but that is not very high on my list of to-dos because my depression is already damn-near debilitating and alcohol just throws me off even more.
“Should I kill myself, or have a cup of coffee?”
Camus
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Re: Poontang

Postby Akuma » Fri May 29, 2020 9:48 am

Legend has it there are mysterious beings that offer sex for money.
You sound like you just want to ###$, that seems like the best option, plus you can call up front and explain what you want and dont want and if any of the workers there can satisfy that.
Or I'm sure theres some sex-meet-up-app for heteros like Tinder or something that you can use?
dx: dissociative disorder + npd
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