Our partner

Are narcs easy to manipulate?

Narcissistic Personality Disorder message board, open discussion, and online support group.

Moderator: realityhere

Are narcs easy to manipulate?

Postby flightrisk » Sat Jun 15, 2019 11:00 pm

I know the mainstream public thinks that narcs are the ones doing all of the manipulation. But if pwNPD are reliant on others to feel good about themselves, aren't they fairly easy to manipulate?
flightrisk
Consumer 1
Consumer 1
 
Posts: 25
Joined: Wed Apr 24, 2019 4:24 am
Local time: Tue Nov 12, 2019 1:39 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)


ADVERTISEMENT

Re: Are narcs easy to manipulated

Postby Greebo » Sun Jun 16, 2019 1:48 am

It don’t think narcs are particularly manipulative. Exploitative certainly due to their lack of empathy and entitlement but they rarely use the less palatable forms of coercion and most of the deceit and emotional impact they have is the largely the product of aspects of the condition which are entirely or partially below the level of consious accessibility. Equally from a rational standpoint grandiosity is not particularly convincing, people who are ‘tricked’ by narcissists have mostly deceived themselves. They want/need the pwNPDs unrealistic self image to be true and so they buy into it.

My personal experience is that most pwNPD are particularly susceptible to the same methods they ‘use’ on others. I say most because I really have no idea how to approach someone like akuma with a strong element of the schizoid about them.

Every healthy personality contains internalised components. Not just idealised concepts of what we perceived as admirable/contemptible but also ideas of ‘this is how the story should play out’ and similar. If you can tap in to, or better yet embody, those concepts most people can be lead by the nose and will swallow a considerable amount of crap.

Narcs are that much more vulnerable as those introjected elements have been fused with the way they view themselves and maintain their fragile self-esteem. Not only are they that much more sensitive to the push and pull of those kind of pressures but because the way they present themselves often incorporates those idealised elements, many, especially the more extraverted kind, are actually broadcasting the playbook on how to control them. To the right person with the right presentation my suspicion is that someone with NPD would be radically more impressionable than any non. On the other hand, I would also expect someone to be much nastier once they figure out that they are being played and to re-write history in such a way as to perceive the manipulator as far more sinister than they ever were in reality.
Greebo
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 272
Joined: Thu Jan 17, 2019 10:52 am
Local time: Tue Nov 12, 2019 6:39 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Are narcs easy to manipulate?

Postby CodexGigas » Sun Jun 16, 2019 2:49 am

In short, the narc and their lies were seen through, and denial won't save the narc.
CodexGigas
Consumer 5
Consumer 5
 
Posts: 196
Joined: Sat May 04, 2019 9:05 am
Local time: Tue Nov 12, 2019 11:39 am
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Are narcs easy to manipulate?

Postby flightrisk » Sun Jun 16, 2019 11:09 am

Greebo wrote:Narcs are that much more vulnerable as those introjected elements have been fused with the way they view themselves and maintain their fragile self-esteem. Not only are they that much more sensitive to the push and pull of those kind of pressures but because the way they present themselves often incorporates those idealised elements, many, especially the more extraverted kind, are actually broadcasting the playbook on how to control them. To the right person with the right presentation my suspicion is that someone with NPD would be radically more impressionable than any non. On the other hand, I would also expect someone to be much nastier once they figure out that they are being played and to re-write history in such a way as to perceive the manipulator as far more sinister than they ever were in reality.

This is what I was thinking, too. Quoting (more likely misquoting) from a TED talk I watched last year, "show me a person who needs something, and I'll show you someone who can be manipulated."

Speaking for myself, I feel like I'm on an endless journey to keep parts of myself propped up to avoid complete collapse. I sometimes wonder if that's obvious to the people who know me.

CodexGigas wrote:In short, the narc and their lies were seen through, and denial won't save the narc.

What does this comment have to do with the thread topic? Or do you just like posting nonsense?
flightrisk
Consumer 1
Consumer 1
 
Posts: 25
Joined: Wed Apr 24, 2019 4:24 am
Local time: Tue Nov 12, 2019 1:39 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Are narcs easy to manipulate?

Postby AProphet » Sun Jun 16, 2019 12:14 pm

Yes if people lie about their feelings. You have no understanding of that. You know cognitively that feelings exist and can name them, but you have no idea how they make you feel and what thoughts they drive. So a person can hate you and lie and you still belive it, becouse he/she has no reason to lie in your mind.
And no. You are the one manipulating others. You do it subconciously with uncanny precision. You are able to pierce threw your target and know what hurts the most. Its an automaton, but its extremely efficient. As invert, I was the one manipulating others, into abusing me. Its insanity.
AProphet
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 236
Joined: Fri Apr 19, 2019 6:02 pm
Local time: Tue Nov 12, 2019 6:39 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Are narcs easy to manipulate?

Postby ZeroZ » Sun Jun 16, 2019 3:18 pm

AProphet wrote:Yes if people lie about their feelings. You have no understanding of that. You know cognitively that feelings exist and can name them, but you have no idea how they make you feel and what thoughts they drive. So a person can hate you and lie and you still belive it, becouse he/she has no reason to lie in your mind.
And no. You are the one manipulating others. You do it subconciously with uncanny precision. You are able to pierce threw your target and know what hurts the most. Its an automaton, but its extremely efficient. As invert, I was the one manipulating others, into abusing me. Its insanity.


When did you become aware that you were doing this?
ZeroZ
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1293
Joined: Thu May 09, 2019 4:03 pm
Local time: Tue Nov 12, 2019 1:39 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Are narcs easy to manipulate?

Postby AProphet » Sun Jun 16, 2019 3:27 pm

When? When I developed self reflection and was able to understand my life. I fit all the cryteria for inverted narcissist. Also when I learned I cant function at all if I dont abuse myself. When I was in love I had to abuse myself even more. It was the only thing that was important, drugs and self defacement, what a $#%^ person I am.
AProphet
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 236
Joined: Fri Apr 19, 2019 6:02 pm
Local time: Tue Nov 12, 2019 6:39 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Are narcs easy to manipulate?

Postby Squaredonutwheels » Mon Jun 17, 2019 6:25 am

AProphet wrote:As invert, I was the one manipulating others, into abusing me. Its insanity.


It's interesting that you realized this.
What was the catalyst for such a realization?
Was there a specific event or did someone tell you?
Squaredonutwheels
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 1326
Joined: Thu Sep 13, 2018 3:41 pm
Local time: Wed Nov 13, 2019 5:39 am
Blog: View Blog (13)

Re: Are narcs easy to manipulate?

Postby AProphet » Mon Jun 17, 2019 7:39 am

Squaredonutwheels wrote:
AProphet wrote:As invert, I was the one manipulating others, into abusing me. Its insanity.


It's interesting that you realized this.
What was the catalyst for such a realization?
Was there a specific event or did someone tell you?


Its in the other thread. I fell in love. I saw myself threw the eyes of another, was able to empathize.
AProphet
Consumer 6
Consumer 6
 
Posts: 236
Joined: Fri Apr 19, 2019 6:02 pm
Local time: Tue Nov 12, 2019 6:39 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Are narcs easy to manipulate?

Postby xdude » Tue Jun 18, 2019 1:56 am

My 90 degree view is but why manipulate them? For what purpose? What would anyone get out of it? A 'haha I win' moment?

It's not like it's going to teach the person with NPD a lesson where they go 'oh wow now I see clearly, I am over my NPD'. More likely the manipulator just ends up hurting themselves to go down this path.
We do NOT delete posts

Read the forum rules before posting here. If you are having any doubts about what you are posting, if you are thinking in the back of your mind, "I am going to want to delete this, or these details, later", remove those details, or step back and don't post until you are sure.
xdude
Site Admin
 
Posts: 8440
Joined: Thu Dec 23, 2010 3:41 pm
Local time: Tue Nov 12, 2019 1:39 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

Next

Return to Narcissistic Personality Disorder Forum




  • Related articles
    Replies
    Views
    Last post

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: NPDwidow and 61 guests