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Postby SelfSerf » Tue Jan 08, 2019 3:41 pm

Does anyone diagnosed with NPD have any experience with this?

Am couple-three months into quitting a long-time job, which I by the end absolutely deplored, post break-up and mostly self-induced isolation (I still live together with people who I communicate a lot with). Yesterday, when I found myself forcing myself to work in the library working on my schoolwork. (Resumed studies to get my undergraduate degree, where I have only a few subjects left) I tend to wrestle with a huge lack of motivation, mostly unable to work and just felt extremely disconnected, just staring at the screen, felt like ceasing to exist but on a whole other level. It might have to do with just not being able to get around to finishing my papers on time, already past deadlines yet still lacking any real initiative to really get it going.

So in general just experiencing futility and all that but really to the extent where you feel like you fell out of the matrix. Am not diagnosed but am beyond certain that I have ASPD traits.
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Re: Derealization?

Postby Akuma » Sat Jan 12, 2019 7:25 am

I know depersonalisation where it feels like the whole personality / self kind of dissappears, everything becomes empty and automatic and the self-perception is like a tiny impersonal blob in the middle of an endless nothingness that just looks out of a body that has nothing to do with "me". There usually is some anxiety there too, as a kid I even lost consciousness once in that state.
dx: dissociative disorder + npd
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