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Charm & Charisma

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Charm & Charisma

Postby PurplePlane » Thu May 24, 2018 8:08 pm

How do you present yourself in MOST social situations? Do you present confidence, optimism, high energy, very relaxed energy ETC.

And would you consider yourself charming and charismatic?
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Re: Charm & Charisma

Postby Spaced » Sun May 27, 2018 12:56 am

Externally I'm quietly confident, I'll give a firm handshake and look you in the eye, I'm direct but not aggressive; easygoing and sociable without being overly showy or loud.

Internally I'm hyper aware, constantly monitoring, enjoying any attention whilst also not being entirely at ease.

I know I'm charming and charismatic when I want to be but my default emotional state is entirely blank and emotion-less. It's unlikely you'll catch my 'resting bitch face' in a social situation - the mask comes off when I'm alone or don't feel the need to impress anyone.
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Re: Charm & Charisma

Postby ZombieZ » Sat Jun 02, 2018 3:46 pm

Spaced wrote:Externally I'm quietly confident, I'll give a firm handshake and look you in the eye, I'm direct but not aggressive; easygoing and sociable without being overly showy or loud.

Internally I'm hyper aware, constantly monitoring, enjoying any attention whilst also not being entirely at ease.

I know I'm charming and charismatic when I want to be but my default emotional state is entirely blank and emotion-less. It's unlikely you'll catch my 'resting bitch face' in a social situation - the mask comes off when I'm alone or don't feel the need to impress anyone.


I’d say this pretty much describes me also minus the resting bitch face :D Also I have a temper that gets the best of me once in awhile but I do a fairly good job of suppressing those impulses now.
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Re: Charm & Charisma

Postby Absinthe » Tue Jun 05, 2018 2:49 pm

Are charm and charisma the same thing, or do you think about them differently?

Also I know these aren't gender specific terms....but do they apply equally to men and women? I can't think of a time I heard a women described as 'charismatic'. Just wondering....
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Re: Charm & Charisma

Postby realityhere » Thu Jun 07, 2018 4:32 am

"I can't think of a time I heard a women described as 'charismatic'. Just wondering...."

I wonder why too.
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Re: Charm & Charisma

Postby Quoth » Thu Jun 07, 2018 6:18 am

Just a guess but charisma suggests agency while historically women have taken a passive role in courtship.

I have all the charm and charisma of a chronically flatulent mongoose with a venereal disease. :D
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Re: Charm & Charisma

Postby covertunsure » Mon Jun 18, 2018 4:40 pm

I've been called charismatic a few times before, but it hasn't been how people predominantly described me. But the narcissist in me wants to believe I am, of course!
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Re: Charm & Charisma

Postby Evade » Mon Jun 25, 2018 5:34 pm

I know you said MOST situations, wanting one answer, but that's not the way it works for me. I've got two modes.

If I've weighed up the cast list, environment, context, and everything is looking risk free, then I'm full-on charm and charisma mode, no stopping me. In this mode, I would say most people would use those two words to describe me.

However, if I've detected potential risk to ego, I'll test it out for a while, if it still seems safe, then go into full charisma mode. If not safe, I'm in mode two, which is on constant alert, over-thinking things, watching micro-expressions, second guessing comments, checking myself, checking everyone else, and all this adds massive cognitive overhead to my bandwidth, which slows me down, and gets in the ways of flow, which is where charm and charisma come from, for me. I think I still come across well, but it's exhausting and ultimately not enjoyable.
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Re: Charm & Charisma

Postby madness00 » Mon Jul 23, 2018 1:30 pm

I present a very relaxed energy (on purpose).

I do consider myself to be charismatic, but my social presentation is largely a veneer. I am quite introverted - that is i gain energy when alone and social situations drain me. Though if you were to poll my high school class, they'd call me an extrovert.

So i switch. I plot and plan in my head, then execute with an extroverted persona.
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