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Sexual desires repressed and other gender difficulties

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Sexual desires repressed and other gender difficulties

Postby Serand » Wed Apr 17, 2013 11:18 pm

Hello...

This is my first post here so let me just start off by giving you all some background info about me before I begin. I have been diagnosed by a doctor with Aspergers. I also have Diabetes, high blood pressure and work 40 hours a week under stressful conditions which I cannot control. But I promise you my work has nothing to do with how I personally am because I've always been this way even before I ever worked.

So... how do I put this? Well, I have a lot of sexual desire. I'm extremely horny a lot of the time and it's difficult for me to get my mind off a skinny gorgeous girl with big breasts. Yet, this may seem odd to some, but once a girl walked in to where I worked (she had extremely large breasts and she looked extraordinarily attractive). Men could not keep their eyes off her. Hell, when I first noticed her I was stunned for only a split second, and through all my force of will and power that I had inside myself I tore apart my eyes from her, only to give her my back... I believe she took her leave then. Not sure, maybe she couldn't understand or believe that someone actually was able to look away from her. I want to have sex with some women I find attractive at my work (though probably won't happen, not that I really care anyways) or even in person. And I've tries a few times... but I never got very far. It's not that I didn't want to or that I couldn't force myself to if I really wanted, it's just the mere fact that I am an angry, highly logical, highly reasoning man... I cannot and will not "be nice" to someone just to "be nice." I cannot do it, I've tried many times. An example: A girl I met through a friend is attracted to me. She's very good looking and I'm shocked she likes me. I have a decent conversation with her and things are going well... and then... then she says something which shouldn't be a big deal I guess to most men and women but it drove me to the edge. She says something like "Well yeah and those girls in those magazines, where do they get the money." Well I mean I can't hold it anymore, I try to think "Ok well I'll just agree with her it's a silly little thing" but no... my brain won't let me. I blow up on her, yelling at how stupid she is and "what ######6 moron would say that?" I mean obviously they got the money from modeling. OBVIOUSLY. And I mean there have been many instances like this. Women just tend to say really stupid things. Silly things. Things that make NO SENSE to me at all. I can't stand it, it's so bothersome! I know I know, to get "laid" I have to be sweet and nice and all that but I can't seem to push myself to do it. And now, I believe I am suffering horribly because I have these uncontrollable thoughts in my head when I'm outside and see a girl I can't get my penis to not stick up. I have to relieve myself almost everyday somewhere outside sometimes.

I'm not a "serious" person all the time either, I like to joke around and even make jokes that make no sense sometimes, but only when it's an obvious joke.... these women are serious when they make these comments!

I don't think this is healthy but what I am going to do? Why are women like this? Can't they just not be sensitive and not say stupid $#%^? Is it so hard?

And don't tell me "Oh you'll meet someone one day" because I've already spoken with nearly half the female population! ###$!
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Re: Sexual desires repressed and other gender difficulties

Postby Ada » Fri Apr 19, 2013 7:55 pm

Why are women like this? Can't they just not be sensitive and not say stupid $#%^?

You're the one being sensitive here. For the example you quote, there's no benefit to being "right". And there's a big difference between disagreeing and blowing up on her. Can you dig deeper into your reaction there? Why does her saying something "wrong" cause you such distress?

Is it so hard?

It's impossible. No human can go through their life end to end without saying something stupid. And really whole-heartedly believing and arguing for it.

I guess the question is, do you want to be right or do you want to sustain a loving, sexual relationship?

An alternate thought- we have a great asperger-syndrome/ forum here. I think I might be missing much of the Aspie context here. So you could try asking a similar question there. [But family friendly phrasing, please. We have readers of all ages.]
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Re: Sexual desires repressed and other gender difficulties

Postby Serand » Sun Apr 21, 2013 9:27 pm

Ada wrote:
Why are women like this? Can't they just not be sensitive and not say stupid $#%^?

You're the one being sensitive here. For the example you quote, there's no benefit to being "right". And there's a big difference between disagreeing and blowing up on her. Can you dig deeper into your reaction there? Why does her saying something "wrong" cause you such distress?

Is it so hard?

It's impossible. No human can go through their life end to end without saying something stupid. And really whole-heartedly believing and arguing for it.

I guess the question is, do you want to be right or do you want to sustain a loving, sexual relationship?

An alternate thought- we have a great asperger-syndrome/ forum here. I think I might be missing much of the Aspie context here. So you could try asking a similar question there. [But family friendly phrasing, please. We have readers of all ages.]


I don't know why it causes my such distress... that's what I want to know. I think I just can't stand stupidity. I personally have never said anything that doesn't make sense unless I was stoned...

I'd rather have a loving relationship to which a girl does not say stupid things. But I guess that's impossible. Odd really.

-- Sun Apr 21, 2013 3:31 pm --

And btw, if no human can go their whole lives without saying something stupid how come I've never done it? In all my time I've never said anything that doesn't make any logical sense.
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Re: Sexual desires repressed and other gender difficulties

Postby Ada » Mon Apr 22, 2013 10:47 am

Serand wrote:And btw, if no human can go their whole lives without saying something stupid how come I've never done it? In all my time I've never said anything that doesn't make any logical sense.

I've already spoken with nearly half the female population

Of what? The street you live on? Your town?
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Re: Sexual desires repressed and other gender difficulties

Postby Serand » Mon Apr 22, 2013 11:39 pm

No. About 12 or so cities.

I can name a few off the top of my head

Austin, Dallas, Plano, Atlanta, El Paso, Miami, Sarasota, Athens, New York, New Jersey, Santa Cruz, San Fran... And I've also lived in Europe for two years.
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Re: Sexual desires repressed and other gender difficulties

Postby Ada » Wed Apr 24, 2013 5:33 pm

Let's just take Austin-

Population, 2011 estimate 820,611
Persons under 18 years, percent, 2010 22.2%
Persons 65 years and over, percent, 2010 7.0%
Female persons, percent, 2010 49.4%

820,611 * 49.4% = total number of females = 405,381
405,381 * 70.8% = total number of females excluding under-18s and over-65s = 287,010

"Nearly half" the female population, then, for Austin, is 110,000 to 140,000 women of legal age [and I am perhaps unfairly excluding older women, but I don't know your age.] Unless you work in a shoe shop Monday to Friday and sell chocolate every weekend, this is hyperbole. Which can be defined as "stupid" in conversational terms, since it isn't factual. It's conveying a personal state and doesn't therefore need to make logical sense.

I maintain that everyone says stupid things from time to time. And that it's not a bad thing because it can add colour to the conversation.
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 More than cleverness, we need kindness and gentleness.


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Re: Sexual desires repressed and other gender difficulties

Postby Serand » Sat May 04, 2013 11:58 pm

I'm pretty sure it's obvious that I am over exaggerating when I say half the female population. I just mean a lot. Or quite a few. Or.. I don't know how else to put it... many... I guess. The fact is it's too many for me to just ignore it as something to take light-heatedly because it's everyone.

Ok well you didn't have to explain that much. I just needed to know you weren't completely serious. I don't define it as illogical because of the reason given either.

I'm 24 by the way.

I don't think it adds any color to a conversation to say something stupid. Saying something with an over-exaggeration is fine. Saying something that is obviously not serious if fine too. Saying a hyperbole is fine as well. What is not fine is when they say something stupid but are completely serious about it.
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Re: Sexual desires repressed and other gender difficulties

Postby HesDeltanCaptain » Sun May 05, 2013 9:39 am

Fortunately, many women love a guy who tells them how stupid they are (Badboy drawn types.) So you just gotta keep at it. :)
"I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I pretended to be." - Me.
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Re: Sexual desires repressed and other gender difficulties

Postby Serand » Sun May 05, 2013 11:55 pm

Yeah they might, but not the way I do it.
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Re: Sexual desires repressed and other gender difficulties

Postby KevinG31 » Wed May 07, 2014 7:43 am

Serand wrote:Hello...

This is my first post here so let me just start off by giving you all some background info about me before I begin. I have been diagnosed by a doctor with Aspergers. I also have Diabetes, high blood pressure and work 40 hours a week under stressful conditions which I cannot control. But I promise you my work has nothing to do with how I personally am because I've always been this way even before I ever worked.

So... how do I put this? Well, I have a lot of sexual desire. I'm extremely horny a lot of the time and it's difficult for me to get my mind off a skinny gorgeous girl with big breasts. Yet, this may seem odd to some, but once a girl walked in to where I worked (she had extremely large breasts and she looked extraordinarily attractive). Men could not keep their eyes off her. Hell, when I first noticed her I was stunned for only a split second, and through all my force of will and power that I had inside myself I tore apart my eyes from her, only to give her my back... I believe she took her leave then. Not sure, maybe she couldn't understand or believe that someone actually was able to look away from her. I want to have sex with some women I find attractive at my work (though probably won't happen, not that I really care anyways) or even in person. And I've tries a few times... but I never got very far. It's not that I didn't want to or that I couldn't force myself to if I really wanted, it's just the mere fact that I am an angry, highly logical, highly reasoning man... I cannot and will not "be nice" to someone just to "be nice." I cannot do it, I've tried many times. An example: A girl I met through a friend is attracted to me. She's very good looking and I'm shocked she likes me. I have a decent conversation with her and things are going well... and then... then she says something which shouldn't be a big deal I guess to most men and women but it drove me to the edge. She says something like "Well yeah and those girls in those magazines, where do they get the money." Well I mean I can't hold it anymore, I try to think "Ok well I'll just agree with her it's a silly little thing" but no... my brain won't let me. I blow up on her, yelling at how stupid she is and "what ######6 moron would say that?" I mean obviously they got the money from modeling. OBVIOUSLY. And I mean there have been many instances like this. Women just tend to say really stupid things. Silly things. Things that make NO SENSE to me at all. I can't stand it, it's so bothersome! I know I know, to get "laid" I have to be sweet and nice and all that but I can't seem to push myself to do it. And now, I believe I am suffering horribly because I have these uncontrollable thoughts in my head when I'm outside and see a girl I can't get my penis to not stick up. I have to relieve myself almost everyday somewhere outside sometimes.

I'm not a "serious" person all the time either, I like to joke around and even make jokes that make no sense sometimes, but only when it's an obvious joke.... these women are serious when they make these comments!

I don't think this is healthy but what I am going to do? Why are women like this? Can't they just not be sensitive and not say stupid $#%^? Is it so hard?

And don't tell me "Oh you'll meet someone one day" because I've already spoken with nearly half the female population! ###$!


I think you've got things really mixed up, a lot of women like to argue and they like men to challenge them and disagree because they enjoy the conflict and the drama, they don't want you to be "nice". Where did you ever get such an idea?
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