Just joined

Hello. I just joined and made a post, but it didn't show up. Is there anything I need to do?

T0rmented wrote:Hello. I just joined and made a post, but it didn't show up. Is there anything I need to do?

Hello and welcome! No, you're good- since it's the holidays it might take a bit for posts to get approved, that's all. Your first posts will be under moderator approval for a while until you're established as a member, it's the way the forum is set up, so you're good there's no issues. I've approved your other post; our eating disorder mod hasn't been in lately, and it looks as if the bulimia forum is mostly centered around those actually suffering from it, so I've moved your post into the most appropriate one, the significant others forum for friends and family of people suffering mental illness issues. You're also a little more free to vent in there, than you would be in the bulimia forum. We understand how things can be very frustrating for people who aren't suffering a particular mental illness, itself. So we have the SOFF forum for those affected by our mental issues.

I need people to reply who have experience with eating disorders and especially with bulimia. The people in that group won't have that experience, please move it back.

I understand your feelings, however we have to balance those who are affected negatively by their loved ones, with people that have the mental illness being discussed. The very understandable frustration you're feeling, as expressed in your post- which is not at all unusual, and is very understandable- can be triggering or seem hateful or disrespectful when it's in their safe space. It's precisely for that reason we have a Significant Others forum. In there, you're free to express that frustration.

And if anyone has the disorder, and don't find themselves triggered, they're free to respond in SOFF without feeling as if they're having to be defensive.

And that works both ways- they wouldn't be allowed to come into SOFF and be frustrated and upset when they in turn feel as if their significant other doesn't understand them, etc SOFF is your safe space. This forum's been around for close to two decades now, so there's a reason things are as they are.

I'm afraid the thread stays where it is. It has the potential to be unnecessarily triggering in the bulimia forum, and SOFF is the proper place for topics from significant others, especially considering eating disorders are very easily triggered, and very hard to control.

I understand your point. I'm just not sure that people who go exclusively to the eating disorder forums will visit the significant other forum, because it doesn't have eating disorder or similar in the name. So I don't think I will get relevant replies, but I completely understand your point as I'm very familiar with the anxiety and effects on people with eating disorders. I just need some inside-help on how best to help her.