I'm in serious trouble at work

I'm up for a disciplinary on Monday. They've told me it will be a final written warning but my paranoia tells me that they will change their minds and fire me.

It's really serious. Can't go into details for obvious reasons but I've basically brought the company name into disrepute and what I've done has made the national tabloids.

I know it sounds dramatic...

Feel a bit better today. Still anxious about Monday though.

The good thing is is that I did hold my hands up and took responsibility for it and didn't try and make excuses for what happened.

I am so sorry that you are going through this on a weekend. You aren't alone with this. I hate it when people judge me too.
I have dreaded having to answer for (stupid) mistakes I have made. I try to tell myself that I am a better person than that and it will soon be put behind me.
When ever I have a new regret, I feel all the old regrets that I've ever had hit me all at once. I just wanted to get the meeting over-with as the waiting was making for crazy-thinking.
Be honest with yourself and to human resources. Tell them exactly how and why it happened.
"Good judgment comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgment."
Best of luck to you, Manners.

Thank you Wally.

It did kind of put me back to how I used to feel when I was in trouble with the police or something when I was younger. I've really tried so hard over the years to clean up my act and be a grown up person and take responsibility and I've really struggled with it.

The other person involved was actually fired with immediate affect. I should have been really but the owner of the company said there's no way he'll fire me so at least there's that.

People do stupid things all the time in my line of work and 99% of the time it gets swept under the carpet but this is really serious.

This might be their way of punishing me, to make me wait all weekend until my hearing. Idk.

Manners73 wrote:... the owner of the company said there's no way he'll fire me so at least there's that.

Now I'm confused, you're not worried about your job - you're unhappy that you didn't live up to

Manners73 wrote:I've really tried so hard over the years to clean up my act and be a grown up person and take responsibility and I've really struggled with it.

?

I put more in the other thread.

I keep getting anxiety that they'll change their mind about firing me..

I'm confused about it myself to be honest. I was only pulled for it yesterday.

Wally58 wrote:I am so sorry that you are going through this on a weekend. You aren't alone with this. I hate it when people judge me too.
I have dreaded having to answer for (stupid) mistakes I have made. I try to tell myself that I am a better person than that and it will soon be put behind me.
When ever I have a new regret, I feel all the old regrets that I've ever had hit me all at once. I just wanted to get the meeting over-with as the waiting was making for crazy-thinking.
Be honest with yourself and to human resources. Tell them exactly how and why it happened.
"Good judgment comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgment."
Best of luck to you, Manners.

@Wally58, the way you've said this tells me you know the feeling. I do too. All too well.

Manners73 wrote:Thank you Wally.

It did kind of put me back to how I used to feel when I was in trouble with the police or something when I was younger. I've really tried so hard over the years to clean up my act and be a grown up person and take responsibility and I've really struggled with it.

...

This is exactly how I feel whenever I disappoint myself and behave in ways I thought I'd overcome. I loathe laziness and incompetence and cannot hide contempt for egomaniacs. And my attitude always gets me in trouble. Next thing I know, I'm sitting in the Human Resources office. At every job.

As I type this, you probably know for sure one way or the other.

Regardless of how things went, please know that you are not alone in struggling to deal with arbitrary and illogical institutions.

Realize that these institutions are neither logical nor fair. Above all, they are self-perpetuating. They all want people who get the job done and who do not make waves. You are perfectly capable of prioritizing accordingly, whether at your current post or elsewhere.

You have overcome FAR worse things in life. You can do whatever it is you need to do next. You've made it this far, haven't you? No thing has taken you down yet. At this point, no outside thing can. Only your mind can and, when push comes to shove, you can take charge of that mischievous thing, too.

Your future is in your hands. Strong, good hands indeed.

Thank you and excuse me for not getting back sooner.

You are right of course, my life is in my hands.

I got off with a written warning in the end but it's still $#%^.

Even my manager said that it shouldn't have come to this but they had to be seen to do something. I told her that I feel like a scapegoat.

Manners73 wrote:Thank you and excuse me for not getting back sooner.

You are right of course, my life is in my hands.

I got off with a written warning in the end but it's still $#%^.

Even my manager said that it shouldn't have come to this but they had to be seen to do something. I told her that I feel like a scapegoat.

That, "had to be seen to do something", simply underscores the inanity of most jobs--"make work" performances.

Really glad you don't have to go job-hunting. That is a time-consuming pain for which one does not get paid.

It's looking quite good for me at the moment.

Things have settled down a treat. Management have been looking after me quite well since all of this happened and I've been given new challenges and more responsibilities.