Why am I being like this

I wonder why i'm always the one who makes the most mistakes. The one that also makes others embarassed.The one who doesn't know how to react.The one that...Why am I always regreting what I do?I bet i will even regret posting this later...People say that I am good enough and I just lack the confidence.But isn't that making mistakes enough reason why I should blame myself?I'm always the black Swan...I can sometimes paint myself to other colors,but i can't escape from the lake forever...and will still be recognized as the untrustworthy in the end as the rain falls...