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Don't know how much longer I can deal with this

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Don't know how much longer I can deal with this

Postby Alicesees » Sun Jul 09, 2017 4:03 pm

My husband acts like a child, I'm coming to the end of my tether with it.
If we argue, the end result is often being shouted at followed by running upstairs to the bedroom and a slamming door, just like a child.
I feel like I'm only staying with him because of our cats, we don't have children and our cats are like my children. I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to afford or he wouldn't let me keep both and I can't bear to lose either of them, so I tolerate him.
He's childish in other ways too, acting like a kid in public, dancing in the supermarket etc, but I get moaned at if I try to tell him not to because it embarrasses me.
Even my parents say he's childish though they don't know I know they've said that.
I find myself being the first one to apologise more and more these days, then he's smirking because he's "won" and I've "given in" first.
How do I get past this and deal with it, especially when it seems to be getting worse.
I feel like this isn't a big thing compared to some problems but I don't want my marriage to end and I don't want to keep feeling so crap, like I'm letting myself down by putting up with him.
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Re: Don't know how much longer I can deal with this

Postby NorthOwl » Wed May 09, 2018 7:28 am

It's pretty lame that he runs upstairs and slams the door.... yah that's pretty lame. I mean, as long as you aren't brandishing a knife or anything, hmmm yah even then it's a little lame.

As for the dancing in the supermarket, that's a subjective thing, and unfortunate it embarrasses you.

Have you printed this post out and showed him? What would he say? Have you thought about couples counselling?
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Re: Don't know how much longer I can deal with this

Postby Lilyonthepond » Wed May 09, 2018 10:19 am

By what you decribed I do not think that he really acts that childrish. I mean, obviously those things irritate you but I think the main problem lays in the different place. I feel like you lack communication and he really feels bad in the relatioship as well. Because relationship isn't just about one person being happy but both of you and nagging him about him acting joyful isn't exactly how it is suppose to be. Maybe there are other issues that needs to change and the behavior that is irritating for you is just too much to bear emotionally? I have no idea but I think to really give you accurate advice I would need to know more details.

Not having kids isn't usually that great idea in the marriage and cats can't really be substitute to your own offspring. Is your husband satisfied about not having kids? How long you have been married? Did you talk with him through this(and I mean listening both sides and taking seriously each others arguments)?
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