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How do you be nice?

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How do you be nice?

Postby Madness88 » Sat Aug 27, 2022 2:26 am

How to be nice when everything sucks and you feel like a raging b**** all the time but you can't seem to help it. When things that happened in like 5th grade still haunt you or bother you and hurt you.

When you can't forgive, and you see other people do it and tell you to do it, but your mind can't seem to do that, because the hurt is so unbearable?

-- Fri Aug 26, 2022 8:28 pm --

It's like my skin is made of hurt, and the world just moves on, and inside I feel like an evil mean person, but I can't help it.

-- Fri Aug 26, 2022 8:29 pm --

It's all hurt, but nothing ever soothes it or makes it go away. It's literally become my whole identity, hurt. Some say victim, but it's just hurt.
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Re: How do you be nice?

Postby Madness88 » Sat Aug 27, 2022 2:52 am

What's the point of being happy or anything if something is going to come along and screw it up anyways? I know other people have it worse, but I feel things in such extremes that when I'm happy, i'm really happy, but when things come along and screw it up, I feel extremely unhappy, angry, sad, depressed, and then I want to lash out at the world.

-- Fri Aug 26, 2022 8:55 pm --

I can't seem to handle downs at all, well if they are life altering. They can literally bring me down for years and drive me to madness.
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Re: How do you be nice?

Postby DepressedLibra » Fri Sep 02, 2022 7:18 am

Nice can be hard ...especially when it comes to people who really wrong you who you have a hard time forgiving. I still hold onto bitter anger in my past too I can't forgive.Anger at bosses who fired me, fired about 7 times in my life. Anger at bullies in school and bullies at jobs I have had. Friends who used me and turned their back on me. Car salesman who screwed me into buying a car I can't afford and will likely lead me to file bankruptcy. It's hard to forgive when you have had a very tough life.

Honestly I feel like I am done being a nice guy to people. Nice people are often walked all over, bullied, taken advantage of, used, treated like crap, niceness often is not repaid back, women hate nice guys...honestly it is not worth it to be nice.

My problem in life is I am too nice to people and I think because of that I have been seen as an easy target. A lot of times I feel like Alice Cooper in the song "No More Mr. Nice Guy!" I just feel like one day I am just going pop and go crazy.

So yeah it is hard being nice when you feel like a raging bull and angry I totally can relate. Best thing is to try to fake it, put on a front. I will do that at work and in situations where I have to, even though deep down inside I am really hurting badly emotionally and I am boiling everyday with anger.

Problem with being nice is there are more people in this world who just want to screw you over and very few who you can trust.
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Re: How do you be nice?

Postby jsodhoptl5 » Tue Sep 06, 2022 7:17 pm

What do you mean by nice?

It can definitely be exhausting to constantly put on a smile for people all the time. Honestly the best thing to do is just take it a moment at a time. As long as you're not being actively aggressive or 'mean,' why do you need to be nice?
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Re: How do you be nice?

Postby PersephoneL0ve » Wed Sep 21, 2022 12:46 pm

Hi— just feel what you feel. Happy is a state. Sad is a state. Being human is complex. ❤️
sephe- HPD Dx, ASPD trait.
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