Our partner

Explain this experience to me.

Open Discussions about how Mental Illness affects your life.
*****PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE POSTING HERE*****

When posting on Psychforums.com please try to pick the forum you think best fits your post. If your post would fit in a specialized forum (there are more than 100 forums here) then please post there rather than in the "Living With Mental Illness" forum. Thank you for your cooperation in this matter. Moderators could move your thread without notice if they feel it is fitting better into another forum.

The Mod Team

Explain this experience to me.

Postby Juji » Tue May 25, 2021 8:21 pm

I have a friend with similar self esteem issues. We are both quite critical of ourselves. I'm a natural skeptic of all things spiritual or otherworldly so I'm wondering what this experience means....

I had a repeating dream in childhood. A little girl walking through a field, picking wild flowers. I know the girl is me. Behind her, I can see there is a horrible black cloud following her. She is completely unaware. It's hard to describe the all consuming fear of the cloud's presence, but 50 years later, I can still feel it.

So I was explaining to my friend that I have difficulty doing a real evaluation of my weaknesses because when I do, this horrible force takes over dragging me down to hopelessness and depression. (It feels just like the cloud to me.) I told her that I have constructed a sort of mental wall against this force. While we discussed it, I could feel it responding like a deep black cobra in my chest waiting to strike outside my mouth.

(I've dealt with this feeling for at least 50 years.) So the friend looked at me oddly and asked if she could cast out this entity. I don't believe in that stuff, but I figured it was sending good intentions my way so, why not? She commanded the "thing" to leave.

So the weird part to me is that I felt it leave instantly and it hasn't come back. I'm confused. Is this some mental disorder on my part? Am I just highly suggestible? Is it overcoming some unknown trauma? Something else? If it had left gradually, I wouldn't be so mystified. But it was instantaneous. Weird.
Juji
Consumer 0
Consumer 0
 
Posts: 1
Joined: Tue May 25, 2021 7:51 pm
Local time: Tue Sep 21, 2021 8:09 am
Blog: View Blog (0)


ADVERTISEMENT

Re: Explain this experience to me.

Postby Snaga » Wed May 26, 2021 12:10 am

Hello, and welcome to the forums!

That's an interesting story. First off, I'm not sure I'd question a gift horse too closely. If it seems to have worked, then it worked.

I'm quite comfortable with the idea that it was exactly as described- that something was cast out. Having said that, if you don't believe in it, then.... I just wouldn't question it too much, but rather, enjoy it and see what happens now.

If you're suggestible, we certainly don't want to suggest anything that would undo this feeling. But I mean I can't think of any mental illness you wouldn't likely have not already had- which would mean you'd gone through a cycle of 'black cloud'-tranquility, multiple times I think. I mean closest I could think of might be bipolar and well that's have been at least a bit of a seesaw, I think.

Did you feel as if this force was part of you in any way? My mind wanders to the dissociative disorders, DID or OSDD- not all alts are human.

Maybe someone else can provide some insight, but given that you don't believe in 'that stuff', to me that rules out any sort of placebo effect. Which to me, makes it possible that it is just what it looked like. But that's just my opinion.
Image

Tell someone today you love them, for Life is short. But scream it at them in Klingon, for Life is also confusing and terrifying.

We do not delete posts.
Let it go.
Without (forum) rules, we all might as well be up in a tree flinging our crap at each other.
User avatar
Snaga
Site Admin
 
Posts: 18191
Joined: Fri Jun 27, 2014 1:58 pm
Local time: Tue Sep 21, 2021 10:09 am
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Explain this experience to me.

Postby DistortedOne » Fri Jul 23, 2021 1:25 am

When I meditate, I close my eyes and take deep breaths in and out. When I'm breathing in, I imagine a simple, bright white light entering my welcoming lungs. The white light is all good, positive energy.
Conversely, when I breathe out, I imagine I'm blowing out dark black smoke and that is all the negativity and dark energy leaving my body and my soul. Again and again in the bright positive energy that makes me feel good - and out with the dark, negative energy as I cleanse myself over and over.
It's so, so simple and I'm a total skeptic of literally everything but this works for me again and again I can't find a scientific explanation to confirm any of it and I really don't care to.
Of course I can't take credit for this technique but I don't recall where i read it first. No matter though. It's so simple and so powerful. IMO, if that can work so well, why is what happened to you any different? This person truly believed in what they were doing to help you and low and behold you think it just might have worked. You certainly feel like it worked. Sounds to me like it really did. You don't need to waste your time trying to figure out some scientific explanation or something. Don't look back. Move forward with a huge smile on your face because you were fortunate enough for this to have happened to you. Just go with it! Maybe you'll be lucky for something like this to happen to you again some day. Wouldn't that be special!
Bipolar 1
47
Sober since May 2018
Not as smart as I think I am

For bipolar:
Oxcarbazepine varies 600mg to 1800mg daily
Bupropion 300XL/day or a few 100SR's
Lamotrigine 200mg/night

For RLS:
Ropinirole very recently was Pramipexole

Plus a few for BP and acid reflux
DistortedOne
Consumer 1
Consumer 1
 
Posts: 21
Joined: Wed Jul 07, 2021 11:54 pm
Local time: Tue Sep 21, 2021 10:09 am
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Explain this experience to me.

Postby 2ost » Fri Jul 23, 2021 9:36 pm

Had similar, ever returning, dreams in my childhood. Different setting of course, but the same fearful dreading therein. I learned, as a teenager, to dream lucidly and turned them dreams down. It worked until now, decades later. In my case, the dreams were of a kind, not untypical to schizoids, as far as I read. But what I mean: The dreams left, years ans years ago and never returned. So yes - such things can happen. Enjoy, that they're gone, would be my advice.
User avatar
2ost
Consumer 1
Consumer 1
 
Posts: 35
Joined: Sun May 02, 2021 1:04 am
Local time: Tue Sep 21, 2021 4:09 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Explain this experience to me.

Postby SignedUpFor » Mon Aug 16, 2021 8:11 pm

So all I can ask is where can I find this friend or her circle of friends. I could and would be so much better off for the rest of my life! 36 now and I know that I have potential way greater than what I have done but my "darkness" has and still is crushing me!
SignedUpFor
Consumer 0
Consumer 0
 
Posts: 1
Joined: Mon Aug 16, 2021 8:04 pm
Local time: Tue Sep 21, 2021 10:09 am
Blog: View Blog (0)

Re: Explain this experience to me.

Postby Snaga » Mon Aug 16, 2021 9:14 pm

SignedUpFor wrote:So all I can ask is where can I find this friend or her circle of friends. I could and would be so much better off for the rest of my life! 36 now and I know that I have potential way greater than what I have done but my "darkness" has and still is crushing me!


Oh I'm sure a good Pentecostal church would be happy to open a can of casting-out whoop ass. I've watched Charismatic preachers, in person, run down a line of people touching their forehead with their finger and they be falling over like dominoes :mrgreen:

Seriously, I'm sure there are handy spiritualists in the phone directory, if a church that believes in latter day signs doesn't float your boat. Way I look at it, doesn't hurt to try. If I felt I had something that needed casting out, I don't care if they shake a bag of chicken bones at me- long as I get results.
Image

Tell someone today you love them, for Life is short. But scream it at them in Klingon, for Life is also confusing and terrifying.

We do not delete posts.
Let it go.
Without (forum) rules, we all might as well be up in a tree flinging our crap at each other.
User avatar
Snaga
Site Admin
 
Posts: 18191
Joined: Fri Jun 27, 2014 1:58 pm
Local time: Tue Sep 21, 2021 10:09 am
Blog: View Blog (0)


Return to Living With Mental Illness Forum




  • Related articles
    Replies
    Views
    Last post

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 26 guests