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Postby Reece » Sat Jul 07, 2018 8:55 pm

Hi my name is Reece and I'm new here. I have been noticing, recently, that I have had a lot of trouble connecting with my emotions. I thinks it has been going on for a while but I just haven't really acknowledged it. I am trying to figure out whats going on so any help would be really appreciated. Whenever I "should" be experiencing a strong emotion such as happiness or sadness or anger I just... don't. I noticed it first because I wasn't experiencing pleasure and happiness like I used to but I just chalked it up to depression. For example I recently took a trip to Greece which was amazing but I couldn't bring myself to be excited or nervous or anything. and it wasn't that I didn't want to go or didn't care about going because I had been dreaming about this for such a long time but the whole time I was just on an emotional flatline. When things happen that I should really get upset/sad about its the same thing, I see the situation and I know what I should be feeling but I just look on as if from the outside. To fit into society of course I have learned to fake emotions but when I cry or otherwise "get emotional" its like I am watching myself and I have this internal dialog going "do you really want to be doing this?" and I have the option to just stop and walk away. I don't know maybe this is just symptoms of depression but I just want to understand. What made me start really thinking was an argument I got into with my boyfriend and without going into details he was understandably upset and I just couldn't bring myself to have an emotional response. In other words it felt like I just didn't care and that it basically the only thing I have been feeling for some time. Thank you in advance
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Re: Emotionless???

Postby raptureblues » Sun Jul 08, 2018 10:47 pm

I experience this a lot and for me at least it's hard to pinpoint exactly what causes it. I usually put it down to a combination of dissociation, depression, and BPD, for myself specifically. I spend periods of time where I just can't feel anything, no emotion at all. Sometimes it's numbness (I care but it's impossible to feel anything, I feel like a robot), sometimes it's apathy (so I don't care even though I know I should), sometimes it's dissociation (everything feels distant, hazy, can't connect to emotions/reality in general). It's very unpleasant.

I've not really found any good way of dealing with it apart from trying to tell myself it's okay not to feel anything sometimes. It's exhausting and makes me feel like I'm broken, or even a bad person, but it's important not to blame yourself for something like this.

I hope things get better for you.
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Re: Emotionless???

Postby SFBorn415 » Mon Jul 16, 2018 7:44 am

Dear Emotionless,
There are times that I wish that my heart is made of stone
as I know that I'd be in ruins should something happen to certain people in my life. There's a lot of
loss that will be felt in the next several years should I still be living. My parents are in their late 80's
Just lost a Brother six months ago to cancer at 56 years old. My Pomeranian Dogs all three of them are the kids I never had in my life. They're all getting up there in age, which will break my heart when they're ''gone across the bridge.'' It happens to me at times where my heart could be steel. It is usually occurs during an incident with some people or when a lot of people are all over my case about certain things when trying to do something. ''You feel like'' who gives a rats behind'' in my estimations at least.
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Re: Emotionless???

Postby Holodeck » Mon Jul 16, 2018 3:28 pm

Over time if a person is depressed the brain will increase in a chemical called cortisol.

The function of cortisol is more or less to do with adrenaline's fight or flight response. When too much is created the person's emotions turn to nothing.

I had this issue and have managed it with medication. I have rapid cycling bipolar 1 but it could be as simple as depression.
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