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need help but terrified of being "treated" again

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need help but terrified of being "treated" again

Postby yumbby » Sat May 05, 2018 11:16 pm

Long story short. I had a horrible episode when i was 30. Never had dealt with significant childhood trauma. Go to kaiser. they see me for maybe 20 minutes and prescribe paxil. I immediately went into a manic and suicidal state. Not like me. This turned into a whirlwind of them prescribing more and more meds to control the isssues the meds were causing me. Risperadol, lithium, depakote, seroqueal, trazadone, clonopine. I could go on. I got significantly worse with treatment. Ended with me losing my job, my 17 year marriage, everything I owned. I went to therapy recently and they took the Bipolar 1 diagnosis away because the only time I have these issues is on medication. I did a gene swab and found out most arent' cut out for me anyway. but It dosen't fix me. I react badly to medications. My therapist just wants me to move out, which is best but I have zero brain power. I now take only 1 mg of clonopin to sleep. I really need help and don't know what to do.
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Re: need help but terrified of being "treated" again

Postby Riccola » Sun May 06, 2018 12:03 pm

Hi- and welcome to the forum :) I moved this to LWMI to help you get more replies.

"Neurons that fire together wire together, neurons that are out of sync fail to link"
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Re: need help but terrified of being "treated" again

Postby shock_the_monkey » Sun May 06, 2018 12:21 pm

from your other posts, i'd say your therapist is right.

there are some experiences in life that you either live with or die from. mine are killing me. i don't highly recommend that.

move out, put this all behind you, and move on with your life.
something knocked me out' the trees
now i'm on my knees
... don't you know you're gonna shock the monkey

there is one thing you must be sure of
i can't take any more
... don't you know you're gonna shock the monkey

don't like it but i guess i'm learning

... shock the monkey to life
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