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Can IED be a phase?

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Can IED be a phase?

Postby Rap123 » Sun Oct 17, 2021 8:01 am

In my 40's now reflecting on my younger years, the relationship between my brother and I stands out as extreme and beyond normal. Our dislike for one another was "next level" compared to any siblings I have ever known or heard about. I would be physically and mentally tormented by him incessantly. He was free to do so because our father worked the nightshift and our mother was a "peacekeeper" with little to no backbone. My brother was 3 years older than me. Regarding our general dispositions, he was standoffish towards people while I was outgoing and friendly towards people. What would transpire between us was a period of weeks and sometimes months of him belittling me, hitting me out of the blue with his fists and various objects (I always had bruises, one broken nose, and a detached retina), damaging my things, setting me up for failure, hiding my belongings, calling me terrible nicknames, alienating me from my friends, and other acts of terror in efforts to cause me extreme embarrassment and bodily harm. So it goes without saying, I hated him with every fiber or my being. I was also fearful of him and felt helpless as no one would do anything to stop him. I could never pinpoint when I would "snap" but over time the anger and hatred would build within me such that I would unleash a fury towards him that scared even him to the core making him regret what he'd been doing to me. I would actually try to kill him. I would grab whatever was available with intent to murder my abuser. I recall using various objects such as bats, rocks, knives, forks, darts, and tools my father left laying around. *mod edit* My outbursts such a this one would buy me time of about a week then he was back at it until the next outburst. My question is, while I believe my outbursts were "justified" given I was a kid who was at the end of his rope and had no other recourse, would my actions back then be considered as symptoms of "intermittent explosive disorder?" This phase of behavior last from my earliest memory until I became a tween at which time my outbursts were more deadly. Only then did it make him decide it was not worth it and he went on to entertain himself with other things.
Last edited by Snaga on Sun Oct 17, 2021 8:36 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: graphic depiction of violence removed, no other edits
Rap123
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