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trigger**

Postby obbie » Sun Nov 25, 2012 4:29 am

Growing up, my dad's family was pretty messed up psychologically, of course none of them admitted it or sought treatment. My grandfather and aunt both shot themselves, my aunt shot her child as well. My dad has always been pretty moody, and paranoid so was his mother. I have Bipolar 1, and have had treatment, and have lived a basically normal life, after being diagnosed and achieving stability and finally remission. I was obsessed in my twenties, being afraid I was like my aunt. Because I never wanted to be like her, I never attempted suicide, in spite of feeling suicidal daily for half of my life. Suicide is a touch subject to me, and tends to trigger me, I ended up on disability after the suicide of someone I had spoken to and tried to help. On Thanksgiving, there was another suicide by gunshot, and while I have had a lot of therapy, I keep going back and forth between thinking about it and avoiding thinking about it. Thinking I am unaffected, or can handle it, and worrying that it will destabilize me.
I don't know the answer to this yet. I am hoping it will be okay.
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Re: trigger**

Postby Ada » Thu Nov 29, 2012 2:38 pm

I hope it will be okay too. Keep talking here. There are SO many people who understand where you're coming from on this. Take care of yourself.

Safe hugs, if you're comfortable with accepting them virtually. :)
We think too much and feel too little.
 More than machinery, we need humanity.
 More than cleverness, we need kindness and gentleness.


Charlie Chaplain in The Great Dictator
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Re: trigger**

Postby OMNICELL » Fri Nov 30, 2012 6:01 pm

Stay in touch while you go through these things... Therapists, online forums. Keep writing and searching.
Dissociative Disorder
CPTSD
AVPD; Social avoidance
Previous/Psychotic clinical Depression
agoraphobia
obsessive/compulsive disorder
Evolution didn't stop my death, God did .....Now what?
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