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Fetish: is it learnt or

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Fetish: is it learnt or

Postby benzpheta » Tue Oct 27, 2015 12:54 am

So,

the other day i was in psychology class and my professor said fetishes are similar to phobias, we learn them. This kind of stuck with me and i attempted to ask her about it but she didn't really answer my question.

Are fetishes learnt? Do we just see it once and become attracted to it, what makes us have the fetishes we have?

I hope there's an answer to this, please dont tell me to google it though. I'd enjoy personal answers like relate it to your own fetishes.

Thanks!
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Re: Fetish: is it learnt or

Postby Alice00 » Sat Nov 07, 2015 2:12 pm

(English is not my first language, so if I'm hard to understand, sorry! ;))

I think this is a very interesting subject too.
I did some research on it, but most of it concluded that it was unknown how fetishes come to exist.
I read that there are some theories about certain childhood problems that would cause a fetish.

Personally, I think a fetish is something that you somehow learnt, but it also depends on your personality what kind of fetish you will have or maybe your personality won't 'make you' have a fetish at all. I think most fetishes are learnt in our childhood. I have always known my (extreme) fetish since I ever became interested in sex at all (when I was about 12).

That's all I have for you ;)

How do you think a fetish 'originates'?
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Re: Fetish: is it learnt or

Postby Excuses » Thu Nov 19, 2015 12:23 am

Learnt isn't a word.
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Re: Fetish: is it learnt or

Postby benzpheta » Thu Nov 19, 2015 9:58 am

You're wrong.

It's the British spelling of 'learned'.
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Re: Fetish: is it learnt or

Postby Wally58 » Fri Nov 20, 2015 12:02 pm

Returning to the topic at hand. Spell-check is on.
What goes through your mind when you're acting-out your fetish?
For me, it reminds me of when I first encountered the sensation that aroused me so long ago and still consistently arouses me today.
Like déjá vu. A fetish can be a life-long fancy. A longing or a yearning.
For me, it can be triggered by a cool breeze, a darkened hallway, stillness. It all floods back to me. I was in that place back then. I still ask myself 'why', but I don't dwell on the 'why' or drink over it like I used to.
A counselor told me it is the way we are 'wired'. Because it is re-enforced by the 'pleasure centers' of our brain, we keep seeking it out.
It is deeply personal, although many of us share the same fetishes. We may have even come upon it in a similar manner. It is not right or wrong, it just is.
I feel as long as no one is injured or forced against their will or breaks the law, it should be OK. :mrgreen:
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Re: Fetish: is it learnt or

Postby Rednecks Pocket » Fri Nov 20, 2015 2:31 pm

OP Benzpheta

I agree and I disagree with your prof. Fetishes and phobias are both reactions from a stimulated neural pathway.

You see a spider and you have arachnaphobia, your eyes send a message to your brain and your fight/flight response is activated. Fetishes work the same way, there is a response from the brain due to earlier exposure which was experienced as pleasurable and sexual.

Both sexual arousal and the opposite phobias have a physiological and a psychological aspect to them. I think that's what your prof neglected to clarify.

It can be learnt behaviour, it can also be acquired behaviour and lastly it can be replacement behaviour. This would explain why most women are not happy around creepy crawlies while it doesn't affect most men, that's where the hard wiring comes in.
Replacement behaviour is substituting an action that isn't acquired because the action is related to other memories that are pleasant or not. Starts with a pinch, ends with a peg.

Good luck with the studies. :)
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