Just love to be hated, taunting and provoking

Hi,

So I'm not sure if this fetish is erotic by definition, but you can say it sometimes turns me on, or I just get a great thrill from it, I don't know. But I just love to provoke others. With taunting remarks whether they are subtle, sarcastic or straight out mean. I love starting arguments, acting rude, talking down to others though I don't mean it. Secretly, I don't mind if they call me out on it - in fact I'd love to.... I want to be punished for the pathetic person I am, I want to be reviled but of course I would never admit it.
I just like to pester the hell out of others so they hate me and pay attention - it's a real rush, even though sadly, I can't indulge in it. I often have my mind set on a chosen 'enemy' and if they reciprocate my animosity, it's just... Heaven. No closet masochist unfortunately, it needs to be real not just a game, then I'll lose interest.

Can anyone relate? Or does anyone have an idea what could be the cause of it? Thanks in advance if you reply

Does it sexually arouse you, or does it make you feel emotionally satisfied? If it's not sexual, it mey be "self-defeating" sort of behavior rather than a fetish.

Thanks for your reply, you might have a point. it's not like I really get aroused from it, just a great thrill, I think. I just want to be punished and be put in my place or test others' limits and go way over them, but in real life not in a sexual play. Sm does not appeal to me at all. I do fantasize how all of the above escalates in others beating me up verbally or physically or humiliating me sexually while I begrudgingly undergo it and that does arouse me though. Even though the last is very unrealistic unless I would openly talk about my sex life/ let myself get caught while masturbating or something. Unfortunately, all of this is not acceptable behaviour, so it remains a fantasy

Hmm, you might look into d/s relationships. It's sort of related to bdsm but it's like the whole relationship the sub is supposed to be submissive. I have no experience with that.

Part of the thrill for me is that it is non-sexual - except for the sexually humiliating part, but I see that as part of it, not as the whole thing. However, it is interesting what you say, maybe there are people who are only into the dominance and submission/sadism and masochism part on a more mental level. I mean, the acts of play rape and beating and stuff are only interesting to me if they are a result of the underlying mental power struggle, not if they are an act, a play, out of nowhere, not real.
I find it more attractive if it are people I am not in a relationship with. But then again, there are also people who want to do bdsm as a loose encounter.
Maybe indeed bdsm is what I'm looking for. I dabbled in that scene for a while and gave up because I was bored of the fact that it was all so explicit, and so straightforward.
But Maybe there are other people like me out there.
Thanks for your suggestion.

Ohhhh maybe it's a public humiliation fetish. I never really understood that one.

Yes, I guess that is it after all, thanks. Usually, public humiliation is along the lines of:
1. guy has small penis, fantasizes about getting depantsed in public while beauauatiful girls laugh...
2. girl has dominant boyfriend and wants to be humiliated only by him, because it's his fantasy that others think of his girlfriend as a slut.
Both fantasies do not describe me. I don't like those predictable and rigid roles. I am neither totally submissive nor dominant. But, maybe there are people who are into this stuff who don't feel the need for this kind of black and white categories. Or, who recognize the categories "sadist who iis secretly a masochist" and "submissive who is really dominant" or whatever.