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Help…

Forum for significant others, family and friends of people with mental illness to discuss relevant issues they face.
Forum rules
This is a support forum for the family, partners and friends of those with mental health issues. This forum is intended to be a safe place to discuss information, give and receive support and learn about all the issues related to being involved with a person with a disorder. Whilst it can be healthy to express various emotions, please remember to be respectful about the disorder itself. This is a place for constructive discussions, not a venting forum.

The issues experienced by the significant others of those with disorders cannot always be discussed in the other parts of the site in a way that does not trigger those with disorders. Moderators may therefore move threads from other forums into this one at their discretion.

Help…

Postby Lost420 » Mon May 16, 2022 4:56 pm

I’m so lost… I feel like I’m living in a groundhogs day hell loop and I can’t escape it.

My (26M) partner (23M) and I have been together for three years. When we first met, he warned me about his RAD and how tough it would be for me if I wanted to pursue a relationship with him. For the past two years of our relationship I have been begging him to get help and he just won’t. Every time I try to talk about my feelings he blows up at me and I feel like I can’t talk to him about anything. I have tried following his advice and trying different ways to communicate. I can admit I’m not always the greatest communicator, but the amount of calmness I have had to maintain in moments of borderline abusive behavior is astronomical. I’m at my wits end. I feel like he doesn’t care about me or the relationship. I try coming to him saying I’m having some serious distress about not being hearing significantly more criticisms from him than compliments. This is nothing new we’ve discussed this before but it’s gotten to the point that it’s seriously affecting my mental health. I keep trying to discuss it with him and he keeps finding a reason to be angry. Whether I bring it up at the “wrong times” because we woke up an hour ago and it’s still to early. And then when I wait until nighttime it’s too late. I love the hell out of this man, but I need some help. How can I express my emotions without triggering him? How can I bring up the fact that he needs to get therapy and that’s non negotiable. How do I tell him I need to be heard and cared for and loved. I’m at my wits end I feel like it’ll never stop. And I love him so much, I don’t think I could leave him. I just want this pain to stop for both of us. I sincerely can’t imagine how it must be to want and reject love like this at the same time. I feel like a broken shell of a man. If something doesn’t change soon I’m going to drown.
Last edited by Snaga on Thu May 19, 2022 2:01 am, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: moved to significant others, no edits
Lost420
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