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Advice please? Verbally abusive BPD, PTSD Neighbour

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Advice please? Verbally abusive BPD, PTSD Neighbour

Postby dinkmack » Thu Sep 24, 2020 7:01 pm

Hi, I hope someone can help please.

My neighbour moved in 10 months ago. On the 6th day of moving in I experienced anti social
behaviour from her. I live in a converted flat. My neighbour lives above me and we share a garden.
On day 6 of my neighbour moving in she was stomping on the floor and yelling down to me and my partner. She would stomp on the floor so hard that my ceiling light started to swing and
my windows rattled. She would scream at us telling us to shut up and stop being noisy.
She used to complain that we were loud when we flushed the toilet. It got so bad we opened a anti social behaviour case.
At this point we didn't know she had BPD or PTSD. It eventually got so bad that I confronted her. There was a lot of shouting and my neighbour just denying all the banging and told me she had PTSD. The housing team for anti social behaviour contacted her and it seemed to help. She used to have a rant but it wasn't as loud and the banging became one bang instead of multiple bangs.
This lasted a few months and she started getting worse.
She would shout out disturbing things like me and my partner laughing about her dead son. We didn't even know her son had passed away. If I was in the garden I could hear her accusing me of digging a hole and burying a body. As you can imagine I was very scared at this point. She would also yell things about me being a lesbian and would shout sexual things like how she likes it up the bum.
The banging eventually got so bad that my partner lost her temper and knocked on her door to confront her about it. There was a lot of yelling and my neighbour ended up crying. My partner felt so bad she went and apologised.
This is when she told my partner she had BPD. We immediately looked up the disorder online and tried to be more compassionate and sympathetic towards her. I would have chats with her in the garden and we got on all right. Even though I felt we were getting on ok she would still have bad days where she would yell abuse down from inside her flat. I accepted it because of what I read about her disorder. Fast forward 10 months and this past couple of weeks have been really bad.
For the first time she actually confronted me in the garden yelling at me for talking about her and her dead son and how it was her fault he was dead. I've never done this, I hardly know her. I tried to talk to her calmly but it didn't work. I ended up going inside and shutting the door on her.
She is banging louder and she has started to amplify all the things she yells through speakers so all the neighbours can hear. She also purposely hammers on the walls. She has been telling her friends that I have been nasty too her and she has even called the police on me. The other day she was outside with one of her friends and they were laughing like school kids and being homophobic.
She is making me so angry but my partner who has generalised anxiety disorder wakes up severely anxious every day because she is waiting for the neighbours bangs and shouting.
I've had enough now and I am very resentful. I wonder if the best thing would be to ignore her.
I don't know what to do.
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