Hi, the subject "Going Solo" might be really depressive for some reading this.
Hear me out.
I backtracked to the first time I had a failure on erection. At first, I thought that this was a recent condition but it turns out that I have been failing to go erect since my high school years.
There were times I had sex...well sort of. Maybe 2 or 3 times in my whole life. I never did maintain an erection. After thinking about my poor performance in bed, I started taking care of myself, exercising, hanging out with friends, and even trying to stop habits like smoking or watching porn stuff.
Yes, I did all that. I remember the time I had myself go on abstinence for one month. After that, I am really eager to ... you know ... do it with someone but then this happens. I am shocked... it never stood up.
Those times were dark. I need to think of something why I never get a hard-on. Am I gay or something? Maybe I should try getting naked with you know... the same gender.
Times had passed as I get my resolve. I am doing this. Removing some of the details and just leaving the result... doing that also never get me erect.
Spiraling down the drain, I go. Drinking alcohol, smoking like I never did before, doing anything to ease the pain in my heart, and forget all those but it never worked.
It was a blur why I had it or how I got it but as time goes by... I am 29 now and things were really going clear.
I'm not born to have a family.
I am not born to give life
I will always be alone until I get old
The extent of my manhood is based only on a bottle, a pill, a medication that helps me go erect.
Should I still persevere? or should I go with my fate? Take life out of someone, destroy relationships... GO SOLO...
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