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Can't remember a life without depression?

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Can't remember a life without depression?

Postby Roseredpinball » Tue Apr 14, 2020 7:33 am

You know those questionnaires that are used to diagnose whether or not a person has depression? I never know how to answer that one question asking "have you lost interest in activities/hobbies that you used to have an interest in?" Like, uh, idk, I've always had depression. How the hell am I supposed to know that? Same thing with those articles talking about "getting back to normal" and recovering from depression, but what is "normal"? I can't remember a time before having dysthymia. I can't remember a time when I was "happy". I mean, don't get me wrong, I have my ups and downs like anyone else, but I can't remember a life without depression. So how am I supposed to "get back to normal" or "reclaim my identity" when dysthymia has always been part of my identity? I do feel like my dysthymia has worsened over the years, but I also feel like I may have always had it. I have anxiety as well, and I'm fairly certain I've always had that too, even when I was a kid. I wasn't diagnosed with anxiety until almost middle school though.

Does anyone else feel this way? It's so frustrating.
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Re: Can't remember a life without depression?

Postby Snaga » Fri Apr 17, 2020 9:32 pm

Well I've heard anxiety and depression often go hand-in-hand; or that anxiety often leads to chronic depression.

I've occasionally wished they'd put Depressive Personality Order back into the DSM. It was removed, several editions ago...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Depressiv ... y_disorder

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Re: Can't remember a life without depression?

Postby Alliana » Sun Jun 21, 2020 5:50 am

I also cannot for the life of me remember what it was like without depression. I just know before I got into a deep depression, some guy told me that I was hideous with a wooden personality that harmed my heart because I loved him. I turned off my feelings and now can't seem to turn them back on without being overwhelmed by the immense flood of emotions.

But yeah, I have been like this for 10 years now, I wish it would stop and that I can be finally happy.
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