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Wtf do I do I have two distinct personalities

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Wtf do I do I have two distinct personalities

Postby DoDecaDon » Tue Oct 12, 2021 9:46 pm

One that handles home life (still live at home - mid 20s) and dealt with parents
and my other persona/personality that speaks differently (comes out with friends)

What can I do? Can I merge them? The one I developed keeps me safe around certain people and the other one only comes out when I feel completely safe / then it's a complete switch of tone of voice and attitude.

My "perfected" one goes to do all the educational things. Developed I think to take on things my emotional part couldn't like paying attention and learning in class etc.

Whereas my emotional/hidden one comes out with emotion. It's the side that took over when I went out with friends. It is good at making friends but can't exist in class. It is good at talking to partners/strangers/friends can't pay attention though, when I try it gets locked out and my acidemic personality takes over.

What is going on? What do I do?
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Re: Wtf do I do I have two distinct personalities

Postby TheGangsAllHere » Wed Oct 13, 2021 4:34 am

Do you have a therapist with experience treating DID/OSDD? Initial goals are to increase communication between alters, and to learn to work as a team.

If you already have good communication and teamwork, then you can start to look at what feelings and thoughts keep you separate. If this is DID/OSDD (as you have mentioned in previous posts) there may be other parts as well, who are carrying past trauma and who need help with their pain.

Many people with DID/OSDD don't end up fusing into one personality. It's possible to have functional multiplicity, where you live a happy, fulfilled life with different parts who handle different aspects of functioning. But if fusion is a goal, an experienced therapist can help you work toward that.
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Re: Wtf do I do I have two distinct personalities

Postby ArbreMonde » Wed Oct 13, 2021 5:54 am

As an introduction, even if it can feel like you have "different personnalities" the proper medical wording is "a dissociated personnality" with different senses of identity for different dissociated aspects.

The personnality is a bit like a mixing console with each command corresponding to a given emotion, reaction, function, and so on. When you are dissociated, these commands are separated in different sub-mixing consoles. This is why when a dissociated person switches, they feel like they become someone else because the access to the abilties, systems of actions... changes. Atop of having the sense of identity, changing, when you change the console you use.

Sometimes a "sub console" can look like a huge ON/OFF button. When you turn this button on, everything else turns off. This is what happens as an example when a traumatized part switches and their only button is "re-experiencing the trauma". This is what happens in PTSD: there are "re-experiencing the trauma" buttons separate from the mixing console, and when triggered, the rest of the mixing console turns off.

It can be scary at first to realize it is how we function. But there are specialized therapists as well as interesting books to read, some are listed on this topic dissociative-identity/topic219302.html

DoDecaDon wrote:What can I do? Can I merge them?


Take a step back and breath. Trauma therapy in dissociation is a long process. You will find it described in the ISSTD Guidelines https://www.isst-d.org/wp-content/uploa ... ED2011.pdf There are many steps to do before thinking about fusing the identities together. Trying to force the fusion before the system is ready, can lead to catastrophic results at worse, and a lack of long term stability at best.

DoDecaDon wrote:What is going on?


Most likely - but it is always a good idea to check with a DID specialist to make sure there is nothing else going on and to know what the proper treatment is - what is called a structural dissociation. Your brain separated different "mixing consoles" because it was easier to manage the world this way.

As regarding the "What to do?" well, have a look around at the books thread I linked as well as at the ISSTD Guidelines. It can be a good start to understand what is dissociation and how it is treated in therapy.

Moreover just like the Gang, if you have access to a dissociation therapist, this will be very useful too. A therapist helps you make progress faster than all self-help books in the world.
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Key: ♂ he/him | ♀ she/her | ɸ they/them

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Re: Wtf do I do I have two distinct personalities

Postby DoDecaDon » Mon Nov 22, 2021 11:38 pm

Sorry for such a late reply.

Thank you both for the great detailed replies. I really appreciate it.
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