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Integration: fusion

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Re: Integration: fusion

Postby KitMcDaydream » Sat May 08, 2021 7:24 am

Yeah I got the piano thing about being in tune.

I've never heard of the 'Steven Universe' I googled it and it seems this cartoon is not available on my countries TV channels.

well for whatever reason S + M are able to blend easily and do frequently and seem to both get happiness from it. They do also enjoy been able to live on the inside though as mother and daughter again in a house that Kit recreated for them thats a perfect replica of the home as it was in the 70's with dog and other family members played by other changelings (like an endless role play session).

We discovered M can age slide too after finding an old school report and black and white photo of her at 15 yrs old (the age they left school back then in the 50's). S enjoyed finding a pic of themselves at same age, similar hair, made it black and white, put it side by side and they could be twins! ..of course as Mother and daughter they will bear a resemblance at the same age, though S seems to believe this means they should function as twins so they do sometimes. She believes it gives M chance to see the family home again and her son if she is blended with her when she goes to visit. M tends to go 'in mother role' when visiting the home she lived at as their mother but stays in the background helping S with 'conversation', although she moves forward when brother comes to hug us so she can feel a hug from her son too.

They like it in bed when we are first waking up or drifting off that sleepy state when the mind is more flexible they can each take control of one arm/hand and clasp hands as the body lies there so they can feel physical contact from each other. (not in a sexual manner just as a mother would hold their child's hand or twin sisters may)

They can do that at any time now they know how to achieve full blending but at first they could only achieve it in that state when the brain was moving between been awake and being asleep.

Sometimes they will rub one foot on the others leg and they like to visit each other on their Animal Crossing Islands and have mastered making the characters run and swim together with one using the joycon on the switch lite and the other on the controller for old switch (docked to TV so they can see it on the big screen and be immersed in their fantasy).

These are the only two alters that have this kind of 'loving' but platonic relationship (only ever twin sisters or mother and daughter roles) although CA 'Susie' can also blend with them to have the same 'closeness to mummy' but she tends to 'twin' with Phoenix, to play as 2 little girls the same age.

Myself (Jody) nor Thea, Maddie or the Vulcans seem unable to blend in that way. Bobby and Kit can become one and Kit will do what Bobby wants regarding video gameplay as Bobby never comes out fully in the body. But once the game is over Bobby breaks the link, there's no affection there, they are there only to experience that particular game through Kit.

Since Kit has created an holosuite so Bobby can literally 'live in Hyrule as Link', Bobby has stopped coming forwards to play Zelda in the real world. They may return when BOTW2 comes out, so they can both study and remember it (both have photographic memories) so they can reproduce that in the Holosuite too.

For now we seem to do shifts, its either Me, Phoenix and Susie out or Host S+M out

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Re: Integration: fusion

Postby fireheart » Sun May 09, 2021 5:04 pm

I re-read the guidelines for treatment of dissociative disorders. What I took away from it (not sure if it says this explicitly) is that fusion is possible if there is no longer a meaningful difference between two (or more) different alters - in essence, that the separation no longer serves an adaptive function.

That makes SO much sense. It makes it all make a lot more sense to me...
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Re: Integration: fusion

Postby KitMcDaydream » Sun May 09, 2021 8:18 pm

fireheart wrote:I re-read the guidelines for treatment of dissociative disorders. What I took away from it (not sure if it says this explicitly) is that fusion is possible if there is no longer a meaningful difference between two (or more) different alters - in essence, that the separation no longer serves an adaptive function.

That makes SO much sense. It makes it all make a lot more sense to me...


I wonder if Thea and Maddie have blended with others then as they have not been out for many years and the reasons they emerged no longer exist?
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Re: Integration: fusion

Postby KitMcDaydream » Mon May 24, 2021 8:06 am

Sioux has been on a journey on the inside to find Thea to see if she will fuse or transfer knowledge of her full sign vocabulary, if she doesn't want to come out any more. She has chosen to stay on the inside and is happy, but said if the body did ever experience full deafness again due to medical complications she would come and help us through the initial 'crisis period'.

They were successful in transferring knowledge, Sioux also has access to Maddie's previous original diagnosis - which wasn't much to be honest as they didn't have a clue. Just a list of neurological symptoms really! She's combined that with her knowledge of arthritis which is her 'specialist subject'.

Sioux is willing to do a complete fusion with adult Susan to give her complete knowledge of her 'adult life' for when she wasn't up front and a copy of 'what's on record' about this body/legal identity.

S & M have decided against a complete fusion because they want to be able to interact with each other like 2 twins or mother/daughter would. They do love to co-pilot the body and feel like there's two of them actively working together. I think they both feel less alone that way and it also gives M freedom to explore the inner world if she wants to on her own sometimes or have a temporary blend with CA Susie (which she loves cos she says she feels like she's been 'hugged by mummy again') but she also doesn't want to leave Phoenix on her own who left her tribe to be her loyal companion on the inside for most of the bodies 50+ years.

Phoenix is willing to fuse with Susie if she wants that then they will always be together but again I think Susie enjoys the experience of co-piloting the body with Phoenix when they are playing, they particularly enjoy playing on the wii games together and going for a ride on the scooter with the dog.

I'm still not sure where that leaves me.. I'm kind of feeling left out without a 'bestie' on the inside :(

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Re: Integration: fusion

Postby Truly_happy » Mon May 31, 2021 4:07 pm

Sadly, I don't feel up to reading all of what what said on this thread, but we have so much experience with unforced fusion that we've written and article about it, though we can't post the link here. PM if you want the link.

Anyway, at this point, what are your questions about fusion and integration?

- Imre
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Re: Integration: fusion

Postby KitMcDaydream » Wed Jun 16, 2021 2:59 pm

Hi again

Good news Sioux is willing to be blended/fuse with me because she feels she can really help with this healthy diet and getting us back to a 'good place' but she doesn't really enjoy being 'fully out' in the body. She's also happy for us to still be known as 'Jody' on here and the inner world.

Changing names have caused enough confusion in this system! :o

Susan came back out and loves the new hair (I trimmed it too just the scraggly ends and fringe). the colour shampoo worked. I think we'll stick with it for at least as long as it will cover the grey bits coming through!

Her and M are going to work on practising talking in the mirror so she knows what other people see when she speaks and experiment with different voices. She will also come out and do some exercise.

Little Susie wants to help too by 'riding her bike' (the electric pedals with the wii games) to get us fit again! :D

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Re: Integration: fusion

Postby fireheart » Fri Jun 18, 2021 10:27 am

That's good news, Jody!

And thank you, Imre. I'll PM for the link.
I suppose my questions are mainly about the steps of fusion. How does it happen? What does it feel like? How can you know you're on the right track?
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Re: Integration: fusion

Postby Truly_happy » Fri Jun 18, 2021 2:37 pm

The steps? Deal with trauma, I guess. We never forced or aimed for fusions, so I don't know. They just seemed to happen unexpectedly, but always after we took some big step in our healing process. The last time alters fused is when Marcella told them to just "deal with their trauma [from the inner world]" however they could. Then, we went from hundreds or thousands to just about thirty. Thirty-ish is a nice number, but we took no set course to get there.

- Imre

How does it feel? Well, Imre has never experienced a fusion in his life, so let me explain that. To me, there is no change in how I "feel". I'm just Marcella the alter with more memories--memories from other alters--of life in the inner world as those other alters. No one really went away or died, they are just "me" now. As for the right track ... one doesn't know (or we don't know) until it happens. Not sure how to "make" fusion happen. We never tried that.

Sorry we couldn't be of more help.

- Marcella
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Cullen - male, 13, loves life
Marcella - female, 30s, visionary

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Re: Integration: fusion

Postby ArbreMonde » Fri Jun 18, 2021 4:55 pm

According to "The haunted self" fusion happens between two alters when all their traumas are dealt with, and they are able to function together in an integrated (=connected, coherent) way, and they feel safe enough to fuse together.

We have a few sub-systems and (partial) fusions including me. Fusing for me feels like being all the fused alters, at the same time. Though for me the intensity of each part fluctuates with time. I don't know if it is a normal thing or if it's because we fused spontaneousely.

The sub-systems are either a cluster of fragments - and similarly, each fragment is more or less "here" or "active" depending on the situation though they all share a same global identity - or they are very different identities but with their own specific dynamic of sharing some traits and functionnings.

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Urielles {Uriel|Theia|Saul|Wolf(?)} -- {G/Hosts} -- {Zami} -- Envy -- X/David/Solomon/Scar -- Ulysses -- {Isaïa|Reyna} -- Mirror {Aragorn|Sherlock Holmes|...} -- {Pride|Wrath} -- Trisha -- Lust -- Hohenheim/Theo

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