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One alter missing so memory gone?

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One alter missing so memory gone?

Postby Sarandipity » Tue Jun 23, 2020 7:45 am

I noticed that when No-one came back bits of memory slotted together. Like without her there the memory was incomplete, disjointed, doubt able or anything to do with her and Beth was gone except Beth kept saying she had a gf in prison and I was worried for the last few years till No-one came back she was talking about an outside person she was communicating with somehow without me knowing.

Is it normal that bits of memory aren't there if one of the alters who was present in that memory is awol, missing, locked up or presumed dead (like Karen was but came back)?

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No-one and Peter, Beth and Karen, Mandy and Mouse plus a seperate system of fragments including: rabit and others.
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Re: One alter missing so memory gone?

Postby ArbreMonde » Tue Jun 23, 2020 5:58 pm

I my opinion it makes sense. If the memory is inside an alter, we can access the memory only when the alter is here.

--Zami--
Multiple system Dx autistic, depression, c-PTSD...

They/them: --Zami--
He/him: -X- or -David- | oOo van H. oOo | //Ulysses// | °Isaïa° | ((Wolf)) | {Envy} | #Uriel# | {Wrath} | .....
She/her: ~Theia~ | oOo Mrs. H. oOo | *Reyna* | ♥Lust♥ | .....

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Re: One alter missing so memory gone?

Postby Una+ » Wed Jun 24, 2020 9:08 pm

Sarandipity wrote:Beth kept saying she had a gf in prison and I was worried for the last few years till No-one came back she was talking about an outside person she was communicating with somehow without me knowing.

Haha. Can't make this stuff up. That's one for our thread Fun: You know you're DID when..

Sarandipity wrote:Is it normal that bits of memory aren't there if one of the alters who was present in that memory is awol, missing, locked up or presumed dead (like Karen was but came back)?

I don't know if alters are necessarily always involved but this memories coming and going problem, "now you remember it, now you don't", is one of the most troublesome symptoms of DID.

I found a letter I wrote not long ago in which I mention I learned something very important, and from context I know it really is important, but right now I have no idea what I learned. In the past this would have been devastating but now I stay calm because I know I probably can retrieve it. When I have time.
Dx DID older woman married w kids. 0 Una, host + 3, 1, 5. 1 animal. 2 older man. 3 teen girl. 4 girl behind amnesia wall. 5 girl in love. Our thread.
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Re: One alter missing so memory gone?

Postby Sarandipity » Thu Jun 25, 2020 6:58 am

Una+ wrote:
Sarandipity wrote:Beth kept saying she had a gf in prison and I was worried for the last few years till No-one came back she was talking about an outside person she was communicating with somehow without me knowing.

Haha. Can't make this stuff up. That's one for our thread Fun: You know you're DID when..

Sarandipity wrote:Is it normal that bits of memory aren't there if one of the alters who was present in that memory is awol, missing, locked up or presumed dead (like Karen was but came back)?

I don't know if alters are necessarily always involved but this memories coming and going problem, "now you remember it, now you don't", is one of the most troublesome symptoms of DID.

I found a letter I wrote not long ago in which I mention I learned something very important, and from context I know it really is important, but right now I have no idea what I learned. In the past this would have been devastating but now I stay calm because I know I probably can retrieve it. When I have time.


I suppose it is kinda funny. At the time it wasn't. It still concerns me that it was so convincing. That they can say something so ademently that you're not sure if it's real or not. Especially when I used to get calls asking for Karen from men. Obviously I shouted at them, they have the wrong number when they got adement they had the right number and had spoken to Karen on my number I had for years. Eventually I found out Karen is an alter. Then I remembered I already knew Karen was an alter because I remembered not being able to be friends with a girl called Karen at school because Karen the alter was jealous. With Beth there was no evidence but Beth is an online person who likes to talk to other countries so it could of been online and a prisoner in another country. When No-one came back it wasn't really a relief. It was a not another alter plus one who remembered nothing from age 19 to now. But she did a grounding, looked at old places and although the kids terrified her or being a mum did she has got on with things really well to be fair. She brought with her foot pain I didn't have before from an old injury so she's also the easiest alter to notice the presence of.

The memory thing happens with everything. I think about something then it's gone. I'm half way through something and forget what it is. But the worst is thinking about a conversation I need to have and then thinking I had it, like a reverse memory issue. From a child I used to not know if I dreamt a conversation or had it. It's got slightly better because I catch myself thinking of a conversation and stop it. It's banned to think about conversation, we can write main points we want to say but not think of it because sometimes we forget to have the actual conversation.

Sarah
Monte Carlo or Bust
Rose and Patrick
Batcho and Fortune (twins), Paul and Lilly,
No-one and Peter, Beth and Karen, Mandy and Mouse plus a seperate system of fragments including: rabit and others.
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Re: One alter missing so memory gone?

Postby Sarandipity » Thu Jun 25, 2020 8:31 am

ArbreMonde wrote:I my opinion it makes sense. If the memory is inside an alter, we can access the memory only when the alter is here.

--Zami--


Hi Zami, it seems to be what happens. It happens with normal memory and that makes sense. So I'm thinking it happens with trauma too. I haven't read the trauma stuff I have written so I can't say from feeling but I can say from logic. Sarah
Monte Carlo or Bust
Rose and Patrick
Batcho and Fortune (twins), Paul and Lilly,
No-one and Peter, Beth and Karen, Mandy and Mouse plus a seperate system of fragments including: rabit and others.
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Re: One alter missing so memory gone?

Postby unitywithin » Sun Jun 28, 2020 2:10 pm

this is one of the most common symptoms for my group.

the 2 ways that it hit me was being tested by outsiders to find out what we did and did not know.
and learning that with healing these events happened less and less.

remember our minds kept information scattered to keep us safe, our minds fallowed a program regardless of the events once it learned it was unsafe to know an event in proper order.

now we are training our mind that it is safe to remember events no matter what they pertain to.

I call it the Rubix cube effect, for each event bad or good we have to work the memoirs into the right slot to make past events and present events be in proper order.
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Re: One alter missing so memory gone?

Postby KitMcDaydream » Sun Jul 05, 2020 8:46 am

We have that and looking back realise our memories are much more disjointed than we realised.

The I' that is present now can't remember that there was a period where we rarely acknowledged the sibling existed, neither can we remember the friend who lost their baby so when they mentioned its name we looked at them totally blank like we had no clue what they were talking about, we don't even remember them being pregnant with the middle or last child!

Maybe why Kit has never been able to relate to who she just saw as 'Maddie's friend' as for us, both of the alters the friends relationship spanned across, have disappeared (Thea & Maddie have both vanished and haven't been back for years now).

I am trying to make a 'memory book' from old photo's putting them in the right order in the hope it creates a 'sense of one self' for the body that I feel is missing and holding back progress.
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