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Another what if: A machine or tablet that integrates you..

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Re: Another what if: A machine or tablet that integrates you..

Postby Sarandipity » Wed Feb 12, 2020 4:55 pm

It's the time and mental drain the disorder causes that I would like to loose. I'd like to loose all of it but mostly the brain drain it causes. Like some have said.

The not being who we are today if it wasn't for DID. We did feel that for a little while but then we realised if we weren't abused, didn't have DID, we'd definitely be a much more mentally healthy person so f who we are. Loosing who we are because of abuse and a resultant disorder is no loss at all. Who we could be is far more interesting either way.

If we integrated the abuse and are a complete mess then it's authentic. If we cope then that's authentic too. At the moment because of brain shifts or personality changee or alters - however you'd like to phrase it - we are not our authentic self. That's how we see it.

First flashbacks we had were in psychotherapy over ten years ago. They were body memory and visual about our uncle. We coped in therapy. These ones without having a therapist, not so much so we capped them till we have a therapist so the "trusting your system" idea yes we can see that. It's a good thing.

However how many years has everyone here wasted on drugs and therapy and having horrible memories.

So if there was a tablet or some kind of machine that could align the brainwaves so your integrated and know trauma - we would do it immediately.

Thanks for responses. I know it seems like an odd question but completely "what if" questions allow freer thinking and your responses and reactions helped work through our own thoughts.

Our healing battle has been ours for along time, alone not mentioning what's really wrong. So every step we take in it all things are considered and airing them really helps especially to you guys who actually know the struggles associated with this disorder and our thoughts become clearer on it.

Thanks,

B&F
Currently Fronting System
No-one Paul and The Overlord
Old Fronting System
Rose, Patrick, Karen, Peter, Mandy
(They still pop in now and again)

Terra Magicka: The Twins (Batcho and Fortune)Mandy, Sue the secutary.
(Silent Lake :The Overlord/Mr Brightside who is currently mostly absent from his internal world.)
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Re: Another what if: A machine or tablet that integrates you..

Postby Zor » Thu Feb 13, 2020 7:34 pm

MakersDozn wrote:Hi Batcho and Fortune,

Our answer here is the same as in the other What If thread. We have no desire to fuse.

MDs


I totally agree. I am not sure for ALL of us, but most of us that have talked about have NO DESIRE to be "erased" or "merged" in a fusion like thingy. If it happens cuz it just happens, we'll deal... but like we don't see a need and have NO desire to try and make it happen.

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Re: Another what if: A machine or tablet that integrates you..

Postby fireheart » Thu Feb 13, 2020 8:07 pm

I would take the chance to integrate everyone and everything - I always visualize it as having a really big heart that fits everyone like a nice hug. It embraces all qualities, quirks, lovely little facts about our parts. Yeah, it takes a while for the scale to recalibrate and to find a new balance in which the whole person would function, but nothing would be lost or erased. If anything, dissociation makes you lose and erase.

The machine would, however, need to increase your capacity, your space to hold all of this at the same time. You'd need really really good emotion regulation skills, a safe environment and a nervous system which really (rightfully) trusts that things are safe now.
If not, everything would just fall apart again within a very short time.
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Re: Another what if: A machine or tablet that integrates you..

Postby TheGangsAllHere » Fri Feb 14, 2020 7:06 am

fireheart wrote:I would take the chance to integrate everyone and everything - I always visualize it as having a really big heart that fits everyone like a nice hug. It embraces all qualities, quirks, lovely little facts about our parts. Yeah, it takes a while for the scale to recalibrate and to find a new balance in which the whole person would function, but nothing would be lost or erased. If anything, dissociation makes you lose and erase.

The machine would, however, need to increase your capacity, your space to hold all of this at the same time. You'd need really really good emotion regulation skills, a safe environment and a nervous system which really (rightfully) trusts that things are safe now.
If not, everything would just fall apart again within a very short time.


I really like the way you put this fireheart. It's a very comforting image for us.
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Re: Another what if: A machine or tablet that integrates you..

Postby Sarandipity » Sat Feb 15, 2020 11:39 pm

I think it'd be better. Like fireheart said I imagine it being somehow a combination of everyone. I imagine being stringer and consistent. Of knowing my life and living it every day rather than living it in bits and pieces.
Currently Fronting System
No-one Paul and The Overlord
Old Fronting System
Rose, Patrick, Karen, Peter, Mandy
(They still pop in now and again)

Terra Magicka: The Twins (Batcho and Fortune)Mandy, Sue the secutary.
(Silent Lake :The Overlord/Mr Brightside who is currently mostly absent from his internal world.)
Sarandipity
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Re: Another what if: A machine or tablet that integrates you..

Postby Zor » Sun Feb 16, 2020 3:44 pm

Sarandipity wrote:I think it'd be better. Like fireheart said I imagine it being somehow a combination of everyone. I imagine being stringer and consistent. Of knowing my life and living it every day rather than living it in bits and pieces.


We'd rather be integrated enough to be like aware of each other and what we do when we're out- what others say, do, and experience, and BE OURSELVES... not like "fuse" into someone entirely diff and lose ourselves in the process. But that's just our opinion... and like I said, if a "fusion" happens just cuz it does and it's not like a "goal" or "project" to like achieve, that's a diff matter entirely. But I don't want ANY outside force, be it our T, Zor's wife, or some magical machine, to MAKE it happen. If it's natural and organic, just a "next step" thingy that happens from getting more integrated and working more closely together, that's gonna be a totally diff kinda dealie.

{\Pixie/}
(Body - Male, 39)
Zor - primary host & main poster
The rest of us: {\Pixie/}, Kaitie-Lynn (aka "Kitten"), Kaleb, Angel, Katya, Satin, Charles, Chloe, Noah, and a few rarely seen
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