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Memory barrier

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Memory barrier

Postby Baldanders » Wed Jan 01, 2020 8:13 pm

We have what appears to be an amnesiac barrier (filter? Am I using the right words?) between our inner world and the front if that makes sense. When we front, we often have trouble remembering things about ourselves (as ourselves, not as the person we play in the outer world), about our inner world, about each other, and other memories. It keeps making us doubt our and each other’s existence and makes trying to understand our system and communicate with each other very difficult. It’s confusing and disorienting.
Is this something that other people deal with? Is it a sign that we’re actually faking?
If we’re not faking, what can we do to work towards breaking down that barrier?
Official dx: DDNOS, BPD
Suspected dx: C-PTSD
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Re: Memory barrier

Postby ArbreMonde » Thu Jan 02, 2020 10:05 am

It is something that all multiples experience, if I am not mistaken.

When you front, you can only access the knowledge that the body learnt. Sometimes you can access only parts of it, but you can never acess more.

A lot of us in here, have knowledges that our body does not have. We cannot use it when we front. Because it is not part of the consciousness' databank, if I can put it this way.

For example, there are languages that I know how to speak and write when I am in the Innerworld, and that I cannot access a single word or letter from it when I front. Isaïa, who loves to cook, had to re-learn his favourite recipes in order to prepare them when he fronts. Van H., who know a lot of things about human anatomy and medicine, looses all his skills in front, because they are not skills that our body learnt. Ulysses and Lust, who spend hours talking about philosophy in the Innerworld, cannot say much about it when fronting, because they never read the books while fronting. So their knowledge of the books are kept in the Innerworld only.

On the other hand, things that we do not know when in the Innerworld, we can know when we front, because they are known by the body / are in the front databank.

If you want to keep knowing things when you front, you need to re-learn them while fronting, using ressources outside of the body.

I hope that my explanation is clear enough.

-David-
Multiple system Dx autistic, depression, c-PTSD...

They/them: --Zami--
He/him: -X- or -David- | oOo van H. oOo | //Ulysses// | °Isaïa° | ((Wolf)) | {Envy} | #Uriel# | .....
She/her: ~Theia~ | oOo Mrs. H. oOo | *Reyna* | ♥Lust♥ | .....

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Re: Memory barrier

Postby Amythyst » Thu Jan 02, 2020 10:33 am

Baldanders,

Our system has a strong memory/amnesia barrier that 'protects' whoever is fronting I guess?

Only the memories of whoever is fronting get saved normally, so when fronting we don't remember inside life stuff. Some of us don't even know if we have inside lives cos we have no memories, we just assume we don't exist if we aren't fronting.

There's lots of threads about this sort of thing, if you search a bit you should find plenty of recent discussion on the subject. Bottom line is, you aren't faking. Other people deal with this too.

team Amythyst
Arin(22f); Charlie(6m); Claire(0f); Ewan(4m); Guardian(28m); Janet(4f); Kate(17/22f); L(∞f); Em(22f); Melissa(7f); Nyssa(10f); Rebecca(∞f); Tegan(5f); Viola(17f); V1(22f); V2(16f); Waste(?); et al.
Dx: DID; previously depression, bipolar.(New) Journey ThreadThe Team
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Re: Memory barrier

Postby Baldanders » Sat Jan 04, 2020 1:58 am

Thanks. It's a relief to know we're not alone in this.
Official dx: DDNOS, BPD
Suspected dx: C-PTSD
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