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Still doing it

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Still doing it

Postby Dnester » Sat Apr 13, 2019 6:31 pm

So for two nights now I have been telling the chatter not now wait till morning I have to sleep and nothing happened. Still chatter. Last night it said getting your *ss out of trouble and making a name for herself. I have been writing the chatter done for about two months now and it is still making no sense.
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Re: Still doing it

Postby TheGangsAllHere » Sat Apr 13, 2019 7:07 pm

Why should they listen to you? That's the only time of day that you're able to hear them, so why are you telling them to wait until a time when you won't hear them?

How about lying down earlier so there's more time to listen to them without it affecting the amount of sleep that you get? And what answers do you get when you ASK them what they mean? Like, who are they referring to that they think wants to get you out of trouble and make a name for herself? Your counselor? Your psychologist? Someone else? It's fine to take a guess and then see what they say.

It's not about just writing the chatter down--it's about trying to have a dialogue with whoever is speaking! Write down your questions, and then write down the answers that you get.

This is not only YOUR life--it belongs to them also, and constantly dismissing them is not going to help you.
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Re: Still doing it

Postby Dnester » Sat Apr 13, 2019 7:35 pm

I have been trying to communicate with them to some extent. They never snswer me in a normal way though. There is no internal dialogue except for one time that there was some dialogue about some candy in the therapists office. Usually its just nonsense upon more nonsense everynight. That is the whole reason I question if its really DDNOS.
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Re: Still doing it

Postby TheGangsAllHere » Sat Apr 13, 2019 8:19 pm

How DO they answer you? You’ve said that when they do, it feels like your thoughts. That IS one of the “normal” ways.

And no, the whole reason you question it is because you (as you have said) are afraid to face what it means if you have it. You would need to face how abusive your upbringing was (you have described enough for readers here to see that it was).

It’s not easy, and denial is common, but you are particularly stuck on trying to disprove it even as your descriptions make it more and more clear that that’s what you have. It’s an internal conflict that you need to work out somehow. It’s not helping you to keep up this repetitive questioning as if the answer lies out here somehow.
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Re: Still doing it

Postby Malasha » Sat Apr 13, 2019 8:36 pm

If there's nothing to talk about with the voices, turn them off.

Try the meditation technique. This could really help.
Close your eyes and try to see all the muscle tensions in your body that deprive you of a comfortable state. Pay special attention to the muscles of the face and head. And then, not paying attention to these muscle tensions, you should try to achieve a comfortable state. You can get comfortable condition with a lot of muscle tension. People often do not notice this strong muscle tension and unconsciously support it. This tension may be so strong that your efforts will not be enough to remove it. But your efforts should be directed not to maintain tensions but to remove them.

To do this, you only need to focus on the state of internal comfort.
If you notice that the internal tension as it pulls attention to yourself, try to focus attention on this place, and then as if to get out from under this concentration of attention. This can be called the technique of scattered attention.

Then this thing can happen - you concentrate on some place, you can relax the muscles, but the tension has changed the configuration and went to another place. You track tensions again and you leave from it again and it goes to another place again. So you can meditate as much as you want. If you succeed, then there is a certain pleasure in it.
It is better to do it at night, but you can do it at any time. You can anywhere at least for a moment to close your eyes and instantly disconnect.
In depression, do not orient on the emotional color of the feeling, but only on its strength.
Well, that is the reason for depression can be anything and feelings can be different. But the feelings should be ignored as if they were not.
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Re: Still doing it

Postby Dnester » Sat Apr 13, 2019 9:31 pm

TheGangsAllHere wrote:How DO they answer you? You’ve said that when they do, it feels like your thoughts. That IS one of the “normal” ways.

And no, the whole reason you question it is because you (as you have said) are afraid to face what it means if you have it. You would need to face how abusive your upbringing was (you have described enough for readers here to see that it was).

It’s not easy, and denial is common, but you are particularly stuck on trying to disprove it even as your descriptions make it more and more clear that that’s what you have. It’s an internal conflict that you need to work out somehow. It’s not helping you to keep up this repetitive questioning as if the answer lies out here somehow.


When I am talking back and forth in my head to the chatter it seems like I am making it up. The chatter its is different it comes out of the blue never matching my train of thought when it happens. When I ok who is in there it just sounds like I am back and back talking to myself. Coming up with thingd that arent true.
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Re: Still doing it

Postby TheGangsAllHere » Sat Apr 13, 2019 11:37 pm

But you're not. Different people on here have told you that repeatedly. How about if you just go with it, even if it feels like you're making it up. And it's not very friendly to say, "Ok who's in there?"

How do you know the things aren't true? Even if they aren't factually true, they may be true for that part. It's the feelings that matter.

I'm done responding to these same things over and over. Write down those back and forth conversations. Even if it feels like you're just talking to yourself.

Or...don't. Just ignore everything that people are telling you on here, and inside your own head, and go on with things the way they are in your life if you really don't want anything to change.
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Re: Still doing it

Postby Dnester » Sun Apr 14, 2019 12:40 am

I am having a hard time with conflicting answers. It said mommy, daddy, nobody when I asked them a question.
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Re: Still doing it

Postby Malasha » Sun Apr 14, 2019 9:41 am

TheGangsAllHere wrote:But you're not. Different people on here have told you that repeatedly. How about if you just go with it, even if it feels like you're making it up. And it's not very friendly to say, "Ok who's in there?"


And they'll tell you who it is, of course. :) They can say anything. Voices always lie! They cannot be trusted!
But there is an interesting point - you should not believe this chatter in your head, but you are not disoriented in space, you can believe your thoughts, which you do not consider voices.

TheGangsAllHere wrote:How do you know the things aren't true? Even if they aren't factually true, they may be true for that part. It's the feelings that matter.


All the voices is saying you should verify from other, more real sources.
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Re: Still doing it

Postby Floralie » Sun Apr 14, 2019 2:33 pm

Malasha wrote:
TheGangsAllHere wrote:But you're not. Different people on here have told you that repeatedly. How about if you just go with it, even if it feels like you're making it up. And it's not very friendly to say, "Ok who's in there?"


And they'll tell you who it is, of course. :) They can say anything. Voices always lie! They cannot be trusted!
But there is an interesting point - you should not believe this chatter in your head, but you are not disoriented in space, you can believe your thoughts, which you do not consider voices.

TheGangsAllHere wrote:How do you know the things aren't true? Even if they aren't factually true, they may be true for that part. It's the feelings that matter.


All the voices is saying you should verify from other, more real sources.


You are talking about psychotic voices. They are way different thing from internal conversation that comes with OSDD/DID. Do NOT comment on things you do not know about.

I see you have history of messaging about schizophrenia. That is very different condition from OSDD or DID. There are ways to tell the difference, and person who is asking these questions in here has NO symptoms of psychosis and has CLEAR symptoms of OSDD or DID, and has been also diagnosed with it by an expert on that field. That is why she must be informed how to handle things with that disorder, not with some other condition.

Do you think you were wrongly diagnosed and do in fact have DID instead of schizophrenia? That is sadly one of the common misdiagnosis as well, so that can be possible but it's all up to your symptoms, and we do not do diagnostics in here. If that is the case, please start a new thread about it, but do not tell advice about how to handle things in some other condition, than the one the topic is about. The way to approach voices are completely different in OSDD/DID than in any psychotic condition.

Dnester, if it's hard for you to tell the difference between your thoughts and thoughts from the parts, you can try it in other situations. I think it makes most sense to try to do it, wen there is someone else co-present with you. That means all the situations when the littles for example have feelings you don't have. Say hi to them, tell them they are important, and their feelings do matter. Even if you can't always do things their ways, they still do matter. Be understanding and friendly, and patient. And be sensitive to any response you may have. They don't need to talk, do not expext them to be able to talk to you. It can come as a feeling as well. They may feel bit better after what you said to them, and that's how you know they heard it. Most of the communication inside our system happens without words. I can feel a feeling from someone and with the feelings comes the information WHY that feeling is. And I react to it, and they react back to me. No words, just two separate sets of feelings in the mind at the same time responding to each other.

You can try communication also when there comes a sudden bid mood swing. You can ask WHY? Why they feel that way? Try to remember who YOU are when those mood swings come. It can be hard, because they can mix up with your own feelings or your feelings change to be like theirs. But if it happens like that, that you are sure that is YOUR feeling and understand that all the feelings of others do come to your mind also, so that itself, the fact it happens inside your mind does not mean it's your as a part of personality, it just tells it's yours as a whole system. But if that happens that way, then you DO feel WHY you got suddenly so upset. Write down the reasons, no matter if they feel your or someone else's. Go back and read them when you feel better and try to understand again if it is how you feel about that thing, or if it was someone fronting and then went away and left you baffled why did you felt like that, although you don't think that's true at all or what ever.

There's a lot passive influence from parts as well, and it takes time to learn to tell the differences, but you will learn it, when you give yourself a fair chance to try.

If you are already hesitant and don't want to deal with it etc at the moment when something happens, maybe don't do it then. It can damage your relationship with others, especially with littles, if you first tell them nice things and 5 mins later come here and tell you don't believe them. You need to be trustworthy. So take your time, and prepare your mind to face things. And when denial hits, you know all the answers already, so go back and read all that has been told to you many times already. Do not start over again, go back where you were last time with it and deal with it again.

There's nothing to be scared of in OSDD/DID, because bad things all have happened to you already. Being in psychosis is way more scary, even when it's not true, it feels like it and it can be anything.

Are you still in touch with your traumatizers? I mean your parents. If you are, how much and how much influence they still have to you? How do littles feel about them?
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Lucas M 16 self care manager
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Ferro M 14/24
Rami M 25 inner caretaker manager, inner protector
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