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Host change question

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Host change question

Postby Ponyta » Fri Apr 12, 2019 3:09 am

I'm wondering something. We seem to be doing good- but is it possible to change hosts without wanting to? I'm not sure what's going on. I've been out almost all day again. I'm beginning to become concerned. None of us want to replace our current host. She- as far as I know- doesn't want that either. I'm just wondering. This isn't the only time it's happened either. It's been happening on and off for a while now- at least since December. We did have a lot of issues back then thru lately- but things seem to be going good now. Would that have caused this? I understand her wanting to give me time to do stuff- but this is a little too much. I guess I'm just concerned. Oh- and another thing. Sometimes when I try to switch back with her- she either asks me to stay out longer- or I can't find her for some time. I guess that's what's worrying me the most. She acts like nothing is wrong with her- when I ask. So I'm not sure what's up with that.

-Weirdo
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Re: Host change question

Postby KitMcDaydream » Fri Apr 12, 2019 9:36 am

Mine seem to kick in on their own. 'The system' seems to decide who is needed when. Could you ask if there's a reason? like via a journal for others to write replies in. Don't know if you already do this? it seems quite a popular way of communicating with 'others' in the system on here.
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Re: Host change question

Postby VioletFlux » Fri Apr 12, 2019 10:29 am

Ponyta wrote:I'm wondering something. We seem to be doing good- but is it possible to change hosts without wanting to?

-Weirdo

Hi Wierdo,

We've had a couple 'big' host changes in our system, and a couple 'smaller' ones. None of them were wanted or intentional or whatever, afaik.

First big one was when the body was 18ish. We don't remember a whole lot of that time but was waaaay before we knew about DID and stuff. Just, one day we were someone else and gradually changed everything about our outside life to match the new person living it.

Second big one was year and a half ago, that led to our DID awareness & diagnosis etc. Same thing tho, like just woke up one morning as someone else, and that led to a lot of questions and learning more inside etc etc.

Since then, I ended up replacing V1 and now Arin has replaced me, but those were smaller changes, like not as disruptive overall. And we're more cooperative now, like now it's more Arin and Viola and me as co-hosts I think.

Anyways, sorry, yeah in our experience host changes are possible whether the involved parts want it or not. :(

V2
Outside Team: Arin (22f); Viola (17f); Violet aka V2 (16f);
Inside Team: Charlie(6m); Claire(0f); Ewan(4m); Janet(4f); L----(∞f); Melissa(7f); Mike(35m); Nyssa(10f); Rebecca(∞f); Trina(25f); V1(22f); et al.
Body: 49f • Dx: DID; previously depression, bipolar.Journey ThreadTeam Flux
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Re: Host change question

Postby SOHank » Fri Apr 12, 2019 12:32 pm

There have been days at a time when Sunflower couldn't be found. The longest was 3 days. Usually she comes back after sleeping when she comes back.

I think she would be willing to give up hosting at times, but no one else wants the post for extended times either. :wink:

Maybe tracking how many days per week/month would be something good to share with her T.
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Re: Host change question

Postby Ponyta » Fri Apr 12, 2019 7:06 pm

Thanks y'all! Your replies are greatly appreciated! That's concerning being that none of us want to be host full-time. I see myself as both a protector and co-host. Roles do seem to have been flipped around however. Almost like I'm the main host and she became a co-host. This isn't what I want however. I worry about it being my fault. There was a time- back in December- where I had to "block" our host for long periods of time. That was due to everything going on. I'm worried that played a role in it. I feel sick thinking it was my fault. I can ask the others. In fact- I'm curious as to what they have to say regarding this matter. Tracking the number of days sounds like a good idea. I'll have to do that.

Thanks again!

Body:(Female-27)

There are A LOT of us (Over 70.....due to that)......we're updating our signature to reflect those who might post.

Protectors:
Weirdo (Male), Wolverine (Male), Blaze (Male), Brian (Male),Shadow (Male)

Others:
Bandit (M), Matt (M),Mary (F), Blue (F), Gloom (F), Rage (F).....
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Re: Host change question

Postby subversiverisks » Sun Apr 14, 2019 11:47 pm

The alter if not bad or nasty wants to bridge the gap with an affect, conscious, something to make have more continuity. Please read the Dsm 5 for the rest of the definition. They aren't against the host, not necessarily just they can embed or internalize a way
Of being that can really be helpful to moments. So if the host is changing the question ask what is the deeper need the conflict within. Maybe u both don't know or it is not time to know for either. Some terms I get is "u got it" "cant call it" the sense is with others just uh protecting you until safety is attained.
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Re: Host change question

Postby Ponyta » Mon Apr 15, 2019 3:48 am

Thanks subversiverisks! I appreciate your reply.
Body:(Female-27)

There are A LOT of us (Over 70.....due to that)......we're updating our signature to reflect those who might post.

Protectors:
Weirdo (Male), Wolverine (Male), Blaze (Male), Brian (Male),Shadow (Male)

Others:
Bandit (M), Matt (M),Mary (F), Blue (F), Gloom (F), Rage (F).....
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Ponyta
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Re: Host change question

Postby Sarandipity » Mon Apr 15, 2019 8:25 am

We swap around alot and try to share the body as best we can. Different parts can last longer fronting than others. Sometimes parts flit in and out and sometimes they last longer. Mandy can last a few hours on her own but falls asleep. Beth and Karen can last days, weeks, months out front alone. The co-fronted for 3 years constantly so that's possibly why. The twins will stay for less than hour at a time because they hate it and get bored.

So I don't feel like there's a host but if there is it's me, Beth. I was inside for about 18months and when I came back out front I didn't want to be out front again but quickly I forgot what living internally is like.

Maybe your host is taking a break and they'll come back when they're ready. I lost track of everyone a couple of weeks ago and I didn't like it so I know it's not great.

What does the host like, what would draw them out?
[/coloru]Sarandipity
[color=#BF40FF]Beth
KarenPatrickPeterthe twinsMandyRose
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Re: Host change question

Postby BeccaBee » Mon Apr 15, 2019 10:09 am

We change team captains about once every three years.

we just get tired.

no we can't control it. no we don't worry about it. everybody on the team has the same mission. we are ok with taking turns.
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Dx: DID, C-PTSD, Panic Disorder


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Re: Host change question

Postby Ponyta » Mon Apr 15, 2019 7:11 pm

Hey Sarandipity and BeccaBee! Thanks for the information. It's greatly appreciated.
Sarandipity wrote:I lost track of everyone a couple of weeks ago and I didn't like it so I know it's not great.
I'm sorry to hear that. I hope things are better for y'all now.
Sarandipity wrote:Maybe your host is taking a break and they'll come back when they're ready.
What does the host like, what would draw them out?
I hope that's all it is. She was co-conscious with me a few times yesterday- but every time she comes out- she's exhausted. She says she never felt so tired in her life. It's apparently only affecting her. I feel fine- so do the others. She likes a lot of different things- but since she's so exhausted- it's probably best she rests.
Body:(Female-27)

There are A LOT of us (Over 70.....due to that)......we're updating our signature to reflect those who might post.

Protectors:
Weirdo (Male), Wolverine (Male), Blaze (Male), Brian (Male),Shadow (Male)

Others:
Bandit (M), Matt (M),Mary (F), Blue (F), Gloom (F), Rage (F).....
User avatar
Ponyta
Consumer 6
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Posts: 739
Joined: Sat Jul 07, 2018 2:50 am
Local time: Mon Apr 22, 2019 1:55 pm
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