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A knock of confidence...

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A knock of confidence...

Postby sleepingwolf » Fri Dec 07, 2018 8:30 pm

I just wanted to post about a knock of confidence we had today...mainly to 'get it out' and down on paper (kind of). But any thoughts are most welcome too.

We're a creative crafts person by trade, and do that as a job. We don't earn much, but we do well and are going well with it all. We are currently trying out new ideas and new ventures in order to grow our little crafts business, and be able to sell more stuff. Its all stuff that we make.

The process of deciding and making stuff is a hard one for us, as it takes a lot of team-work and, well...a lot of time. We also need to save extra funds in order to try out little ventures.

Anyways, we saved up some funds and tried out a little venture, of which we received back in the post today! It was really fun and exciting, and got them out, put them on a shelf and stuff. As it was our first venture with these things, it wasn't the 'best', or the final product even...not really. There were a few things to tweak and change, but we were pleased at having done something.

I left them out for our SO to have a look at when she came home from work. I showed them to her as well, when I had a moment. She wasn't enthusiastic at all, and didn't really engage about it. She kept on asking how much they all cost to make, and then 'what I was going to do with them...? '...sell them! Duh!? She kept on saying she was 'surprised' I had chosen to do this or that, or make this or that decision... She was just super negative and in the end I just walked away.

It's left us really quite upset. Our SO text an appology, saying she had a bad day at work...but it really was a sad experience for us. We're not talking to our SO tonight, and are having a separate evening away from her.

It's really knocked our confidence in the new venture, and its really made us see how fragile (and important!) our confidence is... especially over creative things.

At the moment we've decided to 'bar' our SO from any creative input, for the foreseeable future. We just don't want that negativity.


Sorry about being vague on what craft it is we do, its just for some privacy, thats all :)
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Re: A knock of confidence...

Postby ItsJustUs » Fri Dec 07, 2018 9:53 pm

I'm sorry to hear that you're hurt and upset. Our confidence can be quite fragile as well, so we can relate to this.

We're glad to hear your SO did apologize. But also totally understand your need for space, and your feelings of "baring" your SO from future creative input. Be proud of what you've done, and it's her loss for not seeing the creative beauty in it.

What kind of things do you like to make?

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Re: A knock of confidence...

Postby SOHank » Fri Dec 07, 2018 10:17 pm

I’m sorry to hear that. Sunflower and I both do some creative work as well. It’s different than making something for utility like a washing machine or windshield wiper. Creativity requires a heart, soul, a little spark, and insight to a person to make it really good, which is good, but also extra vulnerable. (My apologies to anyone out there putting heart in soul into washing machines and windshield wipers.)

I tend to focus more on business and profitability than SF, so I’m sure I’ve done something similar to her. :( At the same time, I know what you mean. If I’m sharing something new and exciting and SF is only marginally interested, it feels like she doesn’t care about me personally, and it “deflates my ballon of excitement”.

My thought is you never know if you don’t try. Even as business focused as I am, I have projects that I work on that will have WAY to low of return on labor or investment to really pursue hard. The numbers say I should sell that stuff and recoup the space and money. But I keep them. Why? Because I like them and allows me to be creative without expectation and learn new skills and techniques.


It could also be that this has nothing to do with the project, and more about financial concerns. Finances are usually the #1 or #2 hot button topic in most relationships…
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Re: A knock of confidence...

Postby spinningtops » Sat Dec 08, 2018 12:14 am

hi. sorry to hear your experience. i don't blame you from wanting space. i wouldn't share when someone acted that way about it. also some people aren't artistic by nature and then don't see the value in it unless it can easily be monetized. a lot of people around me aren't artistic but at least i am allowed to still work on my art. and maybe with time she will come around, but it's hard when our partners don't seem to support us.
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Re: A knock of confidence...

Postby sleepingwolf » Sat Dec 08, 2018 2:34 pm

Thanks guys. It was nice to read your support. We're feeling a bit low today but making ourselves feel better too.

I agree with what you guys have said, it was good to hear.

We'll see how it goes

:) :( :?

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