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Healthy to be attached to a headmate?

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Healthy to be attached to a headmate?

Postby Peridot » Tue Jan 23, 2018 2:41 am

Hello, I was wondering if it was necessarily healthy to be attached to a headmate? I've had mine for as long as I've been capable of forming thoughts, and she isn't necessarily bad...? In fact, I look to her for guidance and she usually talks me out of stupid decisions. I hear that if headmates can influence you that much, whether it's positive or negative, you should see a doctor and try to 'get rid of' them? But... I'm happy with mine, honestly. I don't feel as lonely, I feel a sense of unity rather than feeling overwhelmed. So is it so wrong? Should I consult a doctor?
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Re: Healthy to be attached to a headmate?

Postby birdsong87 » Tue Jan 23, 2018 4:51 pm

our former doc used to say that there is a fine line between normal expressions of the mind and a disorder. usually what makes something a disorder is that it is causing you or people around you distress or it limits your ability to function in life or otherwise has a negative effect on your (mental) health.
if you are cool with a headmate and this is not causing you any trouble, is there really a need to change anything?
usually you would go find help if you have a problem. is it a problem?
Dx: DID cPTSD
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Re: Healthy to be attached to a headmate?

Postby TeddyBear the helper » Tue Jan 23, 2018 6:12 pm

Peridot wrote: I feel a sense of unity rather than feeling overwhelmed. So is it so wrong? Should I consult a doctor?


No need for a doctor. a good doctor would tell you to communicate and be friends with your headmates until you feel as a unity with them, and you are already there..
Helper for a couple of DID-ers. Admin for a traumaforum for scandinavian languages , http://traumeverden.net/
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Re: Healthy to be attached to a headmate?

Postby BeccaBee » Wed Jan 24, 2018 11:41 pm

headmates are there. it's a for better or for worse thing. so you may as well shoot for the better.
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Re: Healthy to be attached to a headmate?

Postby IainEtc » Thu Jan 25, 2018 11:19 am

Hi,

Host knew I was in his head a long time before he figured out about DID (or admitted that he's part of a system - whole other story :roll: ). We would talk through stuff and try to make life ok. Anyway what I mean is that we've been living together and helping each other for a long time and that's not a disorder!

There is nothing wrong with having people in your head. The important thing is to get good communication and to help each other. We see a therapist to help us get along and because there are some pretty bad feelings inside. Not to get rid of anybody!

Iain
Iain - 14, Colin - 17, Evan - 7, Cody - 16, Raven, Host - the adult out front

When they say 'be yourself',
which one do they mean?
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Re: Healthy to be attached to a headmate?

Postby contentbrace » Fri Jan 26, 2018 8:06 pm

Yea, no doubt talking friend where you have no idea what will be said for those new moments that life brings everyday is rather joyful. I have no problem with it.
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