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Need Support

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Re: Need Support

Postby Amythyst » Sat Nov 30, 2019 9:44 pm

Hey MDs,

Sorry you're not doing so good again. :( We're thinking of you & sending good thoughts.

I saw your comment on the 'how are you' thread too... if you ever need to talk or whatever and PF is having problems, you can always DM us on the bird site. (I hope its ok to say that here.)

Viola & the team
Arin(22f); Charlie(6m); Claire(0f); Ewan(4m); Guardian(28m); Janet(4f); Kate(17/22f); L(∞f); Melissa(7f); Mike(35m); Nyssa(10f); Rebecca(∞f); Tegan(5f); Viola(17f); V1(22f); V2(16f); Waste(?); et al.
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Re: Need Support

Postby MakersDozn » Sat Nov 30, 2019 9:47 pm

The bird site. :) Thanks. That's good to know.

We called our T. She agreed to Skype at 5pm today. Meanwhile, we paid the mortgage and the monthly co-op bill, which was very important. And we've eaten. We're doing what we can, and we need to remember that it counts for something.

MDs
Multiple self-dxed 1996. Body 57f, no host or original. System of 47: 42 ♀, 5 ♂; 17 littles (7+under), 9 middles (8-11), 14 teens (12-17+), 5 bigs (18+up), + a formless yin/yang duo. Oldest member is 25.

Notable: Charity 25, Deborah 23, Drew 23f, Mary 23, Rachel 23, Laura 17.5, Allegra 17, Cass 17.
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Re: Need Support

Postby IainEtc » Sun Dec 01, 2019 12:03 pm

Hi MD,

Doing important stuff like that counts a lot! Sorry you're feeling bad. I hope you get to talk to your T. It's great they will do a phone session like that.

Iain
Iain - 14, Colin - 17, Evan - 7, Cody - 16, Raven, & Host - the adult out front

When they say 'be yourself',
which one do they mean?
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Re: Need Support

Postby birdsong87 » Sun Dec 01, 2019 3:03 pm

are you feeling any better? thinking of you.
Dx: DID cPTSD
L (host 1); Asti (host 2); Annett (teen protector); Maya (child); Age (observer); Thamara (child); Danielle (aut. teen); Mike (caregiver) and others
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Re: Need Support

Postby MakersDozn » Mon Dec 02, 2019 6:12 pm

Hi Iain and L,

Thank you. We spoke with our T, and it helped. We're going to continue to focus on certain things, mostly attachment-related.

In the ideal life that I once envisioned, there was a Golden Retriever, among other idyllic things. We were afraid of dogs as a child, but we got over it when we first got to know our system and realized that several of the children had pets in the innerworld. For years, there have been three dogs, two cats, and a skunk. But while we've come to identify collectively as a "dog person," and I envisioned a dog in my ideal life, I've never felt connected to that dog personally. It was just there, something that ideal lives had.

It finally occurred to me that everyone inside who has a pet has a connection to that animal, and a sense of security from that connection. I've been looking for years for some sort of meaningful connection to fill the void created by the lack of healthy connection early in life. So why not have that Golden Retriever in the innerworld as my dog, someone who can begin to fill that void?

And so it is. Oddly enough, when I become triggered and regress in age, I lose my sense of connection to the dog. The younger I become, the less connected I feel with her. And I've also learned that when I try to return from a triggered state to a stable state, I need to do it slowly. I can't expect it to be instantaneous. And the others can't expect it of me either.

Charity
Multiple self-dxed 1996. Body 57f, no host or original. System of 47: 42 ♀, 5 ♂; 17 littles (7+under), 9 middles (8-11), 14 teens (12-17+), 5 bigs (18+up), + a formless yin/yang duo. Oldest member is 25.

Notable: Charity 25, Deborah 23, Drew 23f, Mary 23, Rachel 23, Laura 17.5, Allegra 17, Cass 17.
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Re: Need Support

Postby Amythyst » Mon Dec 02, 2019 7:03 pm

Hey Charity,

Thats really neat having the pets inside! Dogs & cats & a skunk! Some of us love skunks, we think they're cute & cuddly lol. We even got a skunk plushy. :)

Also good figuring out about having to get stabilized like slowly instead of trying to rush it.

Wondering if, how you sort of lose connection to the golden retriever when you get triggered, maybe you can like, work on that, like focus on that connection to try to help ground you?

Like instead of having the connection come back as you're getting stable, work on the connection and maybe that will stabilize you? Then its like, your dog helping you to come back to the present and stuff? :)

Viola
Arin(22f); Charlie(6m); Claire(0f); Ewan(4m); Guardian(28m); Janet(4f); Kate(17/22f); L(∞f); Melissa(7f); Mike(35m); Nyssa(10f); Rebecca(∞f); Tegan(5f); Viola(17f); V1(22f); V2(16f); Waste(?); et al.
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Re: Need Support

Postby MakersDozn » Mon Dec 02, 2019 7:07 pm

That makes sense, Viola. It would be good for me to work on that. I think I need to be mindful that our earlier fear of dogs might be contributing to that loss of connection. So I'd have to tread very carefully.

Thanks,

Charity
Multiple self-dxed 1996. Body 57f, no host or original. System of 47: 42 ♀, 5 ♂; 17 littles (7+under), 9 middles (8-11), 14 teens (12-17+), 5 bigs (18+up), + a formless yin/yang duo. Oldest member is 25.

Notable: Charity 25, Deborah 23, Drew 23f, Mary 23, Rachel 23, Laura 17.5, Allegra 17, Cass 17.
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Re: Need Support

Postby MakersDozn » Wed Dec 04, 2019 6:34 pm

Satisfactory job review!

Image

Especially glad because the last two or three have been less than ideal.

MDs :)
Multiple self-dxed 1996. Body 57f, no host or original. System of 47: 42 ♀, 5 ♂; 17 littles (7+under), 9 middles (8-11), 14 teens (12-17+), 5 bigs (18+up), + a formless yin/yang duo. Oldest member is 25.

Notable: Charity 25, Deborah 23, Drew 23f, Mary 23, Rachel 23, Laura 17.5, Allegra 17, Cass 17.
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MakersDozn
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Re: Need Support

Postby Amythyst » Wed Dec 04, 2019 7:25 pm

Yay!

Congrats MDs! :D

team Amythyst
Arin(22f); Charlie(6m); Claire(0f); Ewan(4m); Guardian(28m); Janet(4f); Kate(17/22f); L(∞f); Melissa(7f); Mike(35m); Nyssa(10f); Rebecca(∞f); Tegan(5f); Viola(17f); V1(22f); V2(16f); Waste(?); et al.
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Re: Need Support

Postby MakersDozn » Wed Dec 04, 2019 9:35 pm

Thanks. Very relived. Makes a difference in our overall outlook and level of functioning.

MDs 8)
Multiple self-dxed 1996. Body 57f, no host or original. System of 47: 42 ♀, 5 ♂; 17 littles (7+under), 9 middles (8-11), 14 teens (12-17+), 5 bigs (18+up), + a formless yin/yang duo. Oldest member is 25.

Notable: Charity 25, Deborah 23, Drew 23f, Mary 23, Rachel 23, Laura 17.5, Allegra 17, Cass 17.
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