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For the teenagers!

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Re: For the teenagers!

Postby Jessica6 » Fri Feb 26, 2021 12:52 am

Collective wrote:Hi Samantha,
I feel like you understand the hold Si has on some of us here. When I am getting upset so much, it would be so easy to fall back into the old coping patterns. I know I need to find other ways to cope, I’m just struggling to find anything that truly helps.



Hey there- I don't come out much anymore but I will for this :)

SI is like anything else that's addictive, you know that, we know that. And it's really hard to find something else. we've tried things like rubber bands and stuff, but you know that's just not the same- it's funny- rubber bands on the wrist, hurt way more than our preferred SI- but it's not our SI, and it doesn't feel satisfying, like eating something which doesn't sate your hunger. Which seems to say that for at least some of the people who SI, it's not merely inflicting pain on oneself. It's inflicting damage- and not just damage, but the 'right' damage. Which is of course bad.

We're glad to hear that y'all take the system prohibition on SI so seriously- that's very good to hear- don't forget if you have a hard time struggling, there's a forum for it.

So hard to find something that... for us, the only thing is distraction. When we were doing it a lot, anyway- if we could make ourself not do it, frequently shortly after, the urge would have passed. So... 'I'll do it in an hour'. And then in an hour we don't have the urge as bad. 'Well I'll do it after I've done such and such', and hopefully we get too wound up in that, that we forget to SI.

Sam
OSDD-1b (perhaps):

Jessica (f, 25 PV)
Steph(m,50s orig, body, SV)/-Samantha (f,31 SQ)
-Sabrina (f,12 v)
--Stefanie (f,16 v)

Albert (m,14 q)
Nameless One (m,? q)

Charlie (m,5 q)
Aurora (f,70s? q)

P=Primary S=Secondary V/v=Vocal Q/q=Quiet
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Re: For the teenagers!

Postby Collective » Fri Feb 26, 2021 9:22 pm

Hi Sam,

Our T suggested we hold an ice cube when those of us that used to si feel overwhelmed. Sometimes it helps a little, but I’m often out and about when it hits, so in those instances of course it doesn’t work. Not like I can carry ice cubes in my pocket for when the feeling hits me!

I like your idea of putting it off. I will have to try that.

Hi Cody, Iain, Sasha and Sabrina and everyone else.
I hope everything is ok for you all.

- Nicole
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Re: For the teenagers!

Postby Jessica6 » Fri Feb 26, 2021 9:44 pm


Sam says Hi!

But when she comes out we get all weepy and stuff so and even just thinking about it so and this is like the teens thread anyway and she's all old and stuff and Jess was like she asked Stefanie and Stefanie was like screaming she didn't want to come out I think she's kinda like Sam right now and so then Jess was like what about you Sabrina? and I was like yeah sure!

Um... I think Sam was really like, wanting to say that when you're out and stuff maybe just wear a rubber band on your wrist to snap it's you know not like it don't satisfy like burning (Steph burns) but still it you know you can carry it around and it won't like, melt or anything.

Trouble with that is you get busybodies like the hosty body partner be like what you got a rubber band on your wrist for? huh? pesters us about it and we're like we just have it on okay geeze whats' the big deal! Cause we would have to hide that we burn ourselves but I think people like know and stuff. 'Course our body is like icky old and male and stuff so you know if your body's a girl you know girls can get away with wearing things like rubber bands and stuff an people don't think they're like strange for it and stuff. When we do it it just looks stoopid. :|


OSDD-1b (perhaps):

Jessica (f, 25 PV)
Steph(m,50s orig, body, SV)/-Samantha (f,31 SQ)
-Sabrina (f,12 v)
--Stefanie (f,16 v)

Albert (m,14 q)
Nameless One (m,? q)

Charlie (m,5 q)
Aurora (f,70s? q)

P=Primary S=Secondary V/v=Vocal Q/q=Quiet
The world needs more unicorns.
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Re: For the teenagers!

Postby Collective » Sat Feb 27, 2021 3:57 am

Hi Ya, Sabrina (*waves*)

I totally get what you are saying. I get sick and tired of being in an old body, don’t you? This body/Jo has health issues which totally sux. I liked to do stuff that now the body just won’t let me do. Stupid, old body. :x

Funny you mention about the body’s partner would ask why you had a band on the wrist. That is what happened here. We tried the band on the wrist to help those of us who do si and the body’s partner asked about it! It didn’t help me anyway, just got annoying. I know Nic tries the ice cube in the hand, but I don’t think it helps that much.

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Re: For the teenagers!

Postby Jessica6 » Sat Feb 27, 2021 5:11 am


Hey Rachel! :D

Um I'm sorta out but Jess or someone is kinda too so to um get across what um Steph wanted to say. And that is that yeah um partners can get too darn observant and that's like, when we really mostly quit SI except for just a little bit see we thought we was good at hiding our SH make it look like little scratches but when you scratched up all over you kinda run out of lame excuses and stuff.

And then it doesn't help when others see parts of you and they're like Oh those are burns! and you're like oh crap don't ask me how I got them but you just nod and say yeah well yeah at work or something.

We don't get to work now (they closed up) and so yeah now it'd be really hard. So it's better not to we don't want the attention and partner wouldn't understand anything about us a bit we try really hard to hide as much as we can there's already too much um... weirdness about us they have to deal with. Don't want to make them wonder what they got into I guess. You know how it is.

<3Sabrina<3

And Jess said my color was too hard to read so I changed it I hope that's okay


-- Fri Feb 26, 2021 11:15 pm --


Does anyone fight over the board avatar? The others are nice and let me choose them so we don't really fight even though I know the others didn't really like what I had before (it was a unicorn). Just wondered if others took like turns with who gets to choose or if everyone agrees on one or if like us if they just say hey Sab you like to choose so we let you. Maybe 'cause I'm the youngest that talks on here. Our Little don't say much except when he feels overwhelmed or don't feel safe and he'd never talk here I don't think.
OSDD-1b (perhaps):

Jessica (f, 25 PV)
Steph(m,50s orig, body, SV)/-Samantha (f,31 SQ)
-Sabrina (f,12 v)
--Stefanie (f,16 v)

Albert (m,14 q)
Nameless One (m,? q)

Charlie (m,5 q)
Aurora (f,70s? q)

P=Primary S=Secondary V/v=Vocal Q/q=Quiet
The world needs more unicorns.
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Re: For the teenagers!

Postby Collective » Sat Feb 27, 2021 9:10 pm

Hi Ya, Sabrina (*waves*),

Yeah, we used to have heaps of scars that makes it soo obvious what we have done. We tried to keep it light and not do much damage but that didn’t help us with the feelings. Last year we got a big tattoo which covers the scars. It was the best thing we did, coz for the first time in years we went through wearing tshirts but not having people stare or ask about it. But omg, it hurt! Remind me never to get another tattoo!!

Yeah they used to say all people who si are manipulative and are only doing it for attention. We used to ask how are we doing it for attention when we don’t like to show people?

I totally get what you mean with the partner, you all trying to keep the weirdness down. We feel the same way with Jo’s partner. They’re always asking how we’re feeling, or what happened in therapy or our favourite ‘who are you’ to the ones that don’t come out all the time. We don’t want people to know how weird we are, so we don’t tell em much. Even telling the doc seems weird, like we are waiting for him to judge us.

We don’t fight with the avatar, but I bet we would if the littles came out here! :lol:

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Re: For the teenagers!

Postby Jessica6 » Sun Feb 28, 2021 1:28 am



GOD yes Snags- I mean Steph- didn't want to say nothing not even in PF. We fought (and fought, and fought and fought over it and then it got too much and then the other mods was like hey you need to let them have an account to talk with. So.... yeah. And that's just here. Out there... I mean. ###$.
I mean. It's like he gets mad when one of us is out around people and if we don't go back in (and sometimes it's not as if we can help being out either) and he gets all scared and stuff.

But yeah I get it I mean we ALL get it we have to try and like, tone it down in front of others okay sure.

Sucks though.

Yeah that tattoo sounds great! :D We have lots of tattoos but not to cover up nothing. And we like just get by dealing with if people see scars they're just like not raised up or anything just don't get tan neither. We we've burned. We don't cut. Ugh that's scary.

I come out to answer this but it's... not feeling right I need to go back in I think talk at you later!

<3Sabbie<3

OSDD-1b (perhaps):

Jessica (f, 25 PV)
Steph(m,50s orig, body, SV)/-Samantha (f,31 SQ)
-Sabrina (f,12 v)
--Stefanie (f,16 v)

Albert (m,14 q)
Nameless One (m,? q)

Charlie (m,5 q)
Aurora (f,70s? q)

P=Primary S=Secondary V/v=Vocal Q/q=Quiet
The world needs more unicorns.
User avatar
Jessica6
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Re: For the teenagers!

Postby Collective » Sun Feb 28, 2021 7:11 am

Hi Sabrina,

How hard you are expected to tone it down in front of people. So does that mean you don’t get much time with outsiders? I can be shoved out here during therapy - but I don’t have any control of it.

We love our tattoo, it is a mass of bright flowers, and wraps around and covers the whole forearm. It was a lot of work for the tattooist to try and cover all the different scars, as they were going in different directions and some were burns and some cuts. But she did an awesome job.

I’m still struggling with getting sucked in to the pictures. What I see, the memories, they pull me in and I feel like I’m living them at the time. I dunno if that makes sense.

Sorry you weren’t feeling right out here. Are you feeling ok now? It wasn’t anything we said or did, was it? I would hate to think we upset any of you...

- Nicole
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Re: For the teenagers!

Postby TheGangsAllHere » Sun Feb 28, 2021 6:10 pm

Hi Nicole,

You know those are flashbacks, right? That's what it means to have a flashback. We get mostly emotional flashbacks that don't have pictures, but the ones with pictures are what people usually think of.

This is a good article, because it talks about PTSD flashbacks but also how it's more complicated to deal with flashbacks in DID: https://www.beautyafterbruises.org/blog/flashbacks

Anyway, you probably know all that stuff already, but just in case you don't.
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Re: For the teenagers!

Postby Collective » Sun Feb 28, 2021 8:44 pm

Hi Gangs,

I know I’ve heard our doc calling them flashbacks but I didn’t think it fit for me. I often get scared even though there is no reason to be scared at the time. And now I don’t only see the pictures, I can hear and feel stuff, too. I haven’t heard of that happening for flashbacks, so I thought maybe that’s not what they are.

I am just so tired of feeling like this, I feel like it is never going to end.

Can I ask, what is an emotional flashback?

I will read the link you sent, thank you.

- Nicole
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