How are you today thread (trigger warning)

You will get through this hun xx

birdsong87 wrote:our attempt to use real sleeping pills to get back to a day-night rhythm is failing.
we can be up all not, dizzy but not sleeping, with those sleeping pills.
it hit me surprisingly hard. there is no motivation left in me to manage life today.
been in bed all day, now hoping for someone else to take over to make food.
everything is just getting to me more than it used to.

Ugh--definitely not the right med for you. What are these "real" sleeping pills, if you don't mind saying?

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We saw the T this morning. Starting to feel like there's a hope of getting back on a track that feels helpful, and starting to have our confidence in him restored a little bit. So we're definitely in a better place with therapy than we've been for the past 5 or 6 weeks, without as much hopelessness about this T (or even therapy at all) ever being able to help us.

we usually take mild anti-psychotics to help us sleep. but that hasn't worked for months.
What we tried now are actual sleeping pills, the kind that is addicvtive and should only be taken for so long. it says they would enforce sleep. well, they don't. we still sleep in this weird none-rhythm that constantly shifts. it is a sure sign that the problem is with parts and not with the body itself.
I am just tired of figuring out system stuff.

We're sorry that you're having trouble sleeping, birdsong folks. We can identify, though we don't take anything for it.
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Today we had to replace the microwave that we had for more than 20 years. A few years ago, the 1, 4, and 7 keys stopped working, and we had to play "fool the microwave" with all these weird cook times. But during the past couple of weeks we hadn't been able to use the 2, the 6, and sometimes the 3....

Just another expense that we have to deal with while unemployed. At least we only have enough space on the counter for a compact model, and we found a reputable one that was on sale.

MDs

- Sending moral support to all of you. It sounds like december is a tough time for everybody.

- The hematome in the thumb is still big and purple and painful, leading to learning all sorts of weird and time-costy ways of doing everyday things. Have you ever tried putting a binder on and off with only one thumb? Or self-injecting medicine with only one thumb to hold the vial and everything else?

- At least we manage to do it. It takes time and it is tricky, but we do it.

- I also found very high quality clothes at a second-hand store, for almost litteraly peanuts. It was a good fetch. I was very proud of myself. It does not help with gender passing (people still misgender us even when we correct them) but it helps getting more gender euphoria.

- As for the holidays... We have a pile of things for our Little. We do not know yet if we are going to prepare some special food or not. One thing is sure: we will stay home and visit nobody and have nobody visit us. And it will be very pleasant that way.

- Hoping everything will get better for the whole of you. That you MDs will find a new house appliance at a reasonable price for a reasonable quality. That you birdsong will find a solution for your sleep. That you Gang will smooth things out with your T very soon.

- Take care everybody.

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X

Glad you found a new microwave, MDs.

birdsong, that sounds so frustrating! I remember you talking about negative associations with different times of the day or night--it sounds like all the different avoidances compete with each other and the result is very little sleep!

Thanks for the support, ArbreMonde. Glad that you found some nice "new" clothes, and sorry that your thumb is still painful. Lucky Little to have lots of presents coming up!

We're being productive so far today--exercising, and completing work for the classes we're taking. The semester is almost over, and then we can get back to lower stress things like organizing the house. We'll also be able to give more time to the littles, who have been really shaken up by the all the difficulties with the T.

ArbreMonde folks....glad you found some items you could use, and save money on them. We hear your frustration about dealing with the injury, though.

Gang, glad that you're having a better day. Hoping the lower-stress period continues.

Speaking of classes, our job coach recommended that we take an online course (anything relevant to our field) to show that we're keeping up to date. We started a four-week class on December 7. Now we remember why we hated school.

birdsong folks....hope that your sleep situation is improving.

MDs

preparing for another long night. it feels really lonely.

we are heading into a lockdown. today is the only day we get help with the grocery shopping and it will probably be a war zone out there. grocery stores will stay open but people act like it is the end of the world. there is no right time to do the shopping anymore.
wish us luck

good luck birdsong87

we are thinking of you & wishing you strength thru all this

<3 <3 <3