Mindsets

Someone close to me is on the discocociation spectrum but I'm not sure where.

I experience them as 4seperate people: a teen, a Dom, a little and a gentle female. (Body is male)

Thing is they insist that there is just one person. That what I see are mindsets. There appears to be no short term amnesia (they can remember everything done that day regardless of how many switch is see) but there is mid to long term amnesia. More than once they have got distressed by an Instagram video that they don't remember doing . The mindset in the video is never the same as the mindset in distress. ( I can tell because they each have a slightly different intonation and use different facial expressions/hold the body differently)

I have a few questions.

1 if a system is in denial is it kinder to pretend not to notice and keep on adjusting our behaviour to suit their needs

2 the little gains a great deal of comfort from pretending to breastfeed. We are a did system ourselves and have a mother figure who is happy to oblige in a totally platonic mother child bond. I on the other hand do get aroused through nipple stimulation. It's not happened yet but I'm worried that one night the little is going to wake from a nightmare, seek his usual comfort and I'm going to be the one up front. Should I mask and pretend to be her and hope knowing how young the little is is enough to prevent arousal or should I be honest about who I am, refuse the breast and risk causing further distress?

3 How do I help the female side feel more at home when they as a system insist they are just mindsets, whims that will pass. I rarely see her but the first time I saw her she asked me not to use male pronouns for her. (This was my first clue that there was any dissociation going on because the next day the mindset I now think of as the Dom complained I was emasculating him and denied that he felt anything other than male) Recently the feminine mindset told me she would have been Hannah had she been born a girl but when I used that name to Muse aloud how the favourite hot drink changes according to mindset I was told very firmly by the teen that there was only legal name there arnt any other people. I have seen the feminine mindset looking longonly at our clothes but I'm concerned if I try to acknowledge her again there will be another backlash.

Any thoughts appreciated.