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Recovery of Suppressed Memories

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Recovery of Suppressed Memories

Postby sussieq66 » Sat Oct 18, 2014 7:01 pm

Hi all,
I have DID and I have been working on an area of my life recently that I have amnesia over. during therapy my sexual abuse by my dad has morphed into recitation of other people being there, chanting and group abuse of the worst kinds. I usually try to respect each memory, no matter how horrible unless a later memory shows it was incorrect. this time I find myself disputing the accuracy and the fear and pain I feel is horrible and invading my life because I find myself spending a lot of time trying to write the memory out and accept it. it is stunning and so upsetting. I am in recovery groups but I feel isolated with this new awakening I am experiencing. I find myself doubting the memories and doubting whether I should continue. having dissociative identity disorder and feeling so disconnected and different from others has been hard enough in itself but my life has improved dramatically since working on these issues. as I go through these bizarre memories I find my life continues to improve and I see so many of the things I see and feel are related to the victimization of myself by my dad and others. it relieves some of the sting I feel when I feel I don't accomplish or do as I should but these final memories are hard for me. I find myself doubting the value of therapy or any of my memories and I think the biggest thing is I find it hard to believe such things go on. if there are any ritual or cult members who have experienced DID as a defense mechanism of their abuse I wish they would reply. and thanks for the opportunity to let me express my thoughts where I don't feel I will be criticized. c'est moi.
sussieq66
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Re: Recovery of Suppressed Memories

Postby CopperMoon » Fri Oct 31, 2014 7:35 am

Heya. I happened to see your thread title while browsing the overall forum sections. Not sure if you will come back to check this or not. But it seems like activity in the dissociative forums is kind of low except in the DID forum. You have DID so I hope you would feel comfortable posting over there with us. Your post just struck me as trying to reach out for some relating and support, and I hope you didn't think you were ignored or anything. If you come back and check this please come say hello in the DID forum. I'm not sure if anyone with cult memories would feel comfortable sharing, but you definitely won't be judged and we can all relate to a lot of stuff in each other's posts.
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Re: Recovery of Suppressed Memories

Postby sussieq66 » Sun Nov 09, 2014 10:41 pm

Thanks for the reply. I will check out the did forum. I definitely belong there.
sussieq66
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