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Husband is having a delusion - please help, anyone

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Husband is having a delusion - please help, anyone

Postby Trinity226 » Sat Sep 19, 2020 3:09 am

My husband of 2 years is delusional - he believes his insides are twisted/not aligned and that he can repair this problem by moving, contorting and breathing. He believes he is the only person in the world that can do this and that he is a medical miracle. He has had x-rays, cat scans, blood tests etc and there isn't anything physically wrong with him. His first episode was in April this year...I let it go for about one week then took him to hospital where he was admitted for 2 nights - he came home on anti-psychotics and anxiety meds. This seemed to stop the problem but over time he has changed his meds and I feel the delusion never really went away. About a week ago it started again, and he was in hospital again this week, against his wishes - the only reason he went is because he had an episode at work and they called an ambulance. Nevertheless, he believes he has achieved something amazing, and claims he is now 'fixed' although he continues to make weird movements. He is now on lithium and a new anti-psychotic drug. He has agreed to stop smoking weed, which I think was a huge part of the problem. We are on Day 2 of the new drugs. He is super sad, feels very alone, and doesn't know if he can continue to be married to me because I don't believe him. I hope his drugs and the removal of weed help. Soon. Has ANYONE ever heard of a delusion like this??
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Re: Husband is having a delusion - please help, anyone

Postby Snaga » Sat Sep 19, 2020 6:29 pm

I have not heard of it- but I'm pretty sure that delusions are limited only by the imagination- and some of us are very imaginative.

I have OCD, and sometimes Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder will flirt with delusional thinking. pwOCD usually know what they're half-believing is irrational. Usually. Vast majority of the time. Even at our worst, we usually know, on some level, that we're being silly. But that line gets mighty fine at times. I've gotten really close to jumping in those waters- heck I probably have and not realised it, because, delusion.

Other than slapping him on some pills, has he had any formal diagnosis? And has anyone said anything about therapy? Maybe therapy in conjunction with meds, could help him to understand when he's getting an irrational thought?

And I'm no prohibitionist, but pot never seems to do anyone any good, if PF is any judge. I know in the OCD forum, which I moderate, if I had a dollar for every time someone had a freakout while smoking pot.... I myself know to stay away from the stuff. The idea of it is nice, but the rare times I have tried it, I mostly turned into a mess. I second and third, that he should stay off the pot, and hopefully that'll also help.
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Re: Husband is having a delusion - please help, anyone

Postby Trinity226 » Sat Sep 19, 2020 6:47 pm

Hi there - thanks for your thoughts. His diagnosis from the hospital came back with 'delusional' and bipolar. His mum is bipolar and her father was diagnosed schizophrenic. He doesn't want to go to talk therapy, which is super frustrating as I know there is ALOT of childhood trauma there. I'm confident that meds with therapy will fix this, I just need to help him get there. At the moment, he is on Day 3 of no pot and and Day 2 of the new meds. He is now physically calm but very angry at me for not believing him. He is now saying that all along he had twisted intestines which he fixed himself with his breath. He wants to speak with an "internalist" (??) who he believes will confirm that he is not crazy (his words). I think that he knows somewhere in there that this makes no sense because as angry as he is, he is taking his meds (angrily taking them!) and not smoking pot - though he has no choice on that because i have cleared out the house of everything. I'm just so scared that this will tear us apart as he is saying that he doesn't think our relationship can continue if I don't believe him. I'm devastated. We haven't been married all that long...before this happened I was literally living the dream, living in bliss with the love of my life in Hawaii. I feel that is shattered now :(.. heart broken.
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Re: Husband is having a delusion - please help, anyone

Postby Snaga » Sat Sep 19, 2020 7:13 pm

It's tempting to humor him.

My father sometimes has delusional thinking- not sure what's going on but he's pretty old, so... I just... go along with it just as much as I need to, and don't directly contradict him. This is by phone- I don't have to live with it, however.

If it's affordable (insurance etc) maybe he can see an internist. I'd try to talk to the doctor, ahead of time, though.

Don't really want to encourage him in this, though. Just... I don't know- it's a tightrope for you.

I sometimes suspect myself of having bipolar traits- I also have some kind of disassociative thing going on. I don't know a whole lot about bipolar, but I know those manic episodes can make you think pretty wild, from what I've seen (and experienced the edges of).

I have a family history of schizophrenia. Extended family. As well as delusional thinking on the other side of my extended family, in that case, a direct lineage to me. That was menopause related, and they had to be committed for a while. How much of that kind of stuff can be passed on, I'm not sure. Sometimes I think I'm lucky I'm not more messed up than I am.

taking the meds- that's good, on some level he knows he needs help, even if he resents it.

hoping you can keep the pot from him!

It's a rough burden. Especially only a couple years into a marriage.

You can't directly duplicate this thread you have going on here in DD- where you're trying to find advice for handling him- we allow only one topic per forum, and discourage direct duplicates in multiple forums- but if you need to just generally vent from frustration, we do have Significant Others, Family & Friends forum in which you can go scream a little, if you feel the need to. As well as a blog section, and journal threads. Don't forget your own mental health in all this.
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Re: Husband is having a delusion - please help, anyone

Postby Snaga » Sat Sep 19, 2020 7:20 pm

A little more clarification- in the actual disorder forums (especially the Personality disorders) we don't allow family members/Nons, to go off on whoever's driving them up the wall, but in SOFF it's more acceptable to vent- just letting you know if you need to let off a little steam, we do have a place for that. Might come in handy before you get on the other side of this ordeal.
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Re: Husband is having a delusion - please help, anyone

Postby Tyler » Sun Sep 20, 2020 2:55 am

I agree that the fact that he's taking the medicine is a great thing. A lot of times, when someone is experiencing this kind of thought pattern and behavior, they absolutely refuse to take the medicine. It's important to remember that this medicine can sometimes take some time before it starts to work properly, usually a week or two.

I agree that keeping the pot out of his hands will do him good. People with severe mental illnesses such as bipolar disorder and schizophrenia should not be smoking it under any circumstance. It can only make the disorders that much worse.

I agree with see a doctor that he wants to see (so long you can afford it) and talking to the doctor ahead of time. It might actually show him that, yes, nothing was ever wrong with him, however it could also make him angrier, so be prepared for that.

And yes, don't encourage him in this. Don't give into him, because then you're only adding fuel to the fire. Don't go out of your way to challenge him, because that could, and probably would, make him angrier, but giving into it is letting the delusion win.
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