Strong urges

I have been fighting strong urges to self harm for over 3 weeks now. I'm even dreaming about it now. There is a small part of me that doesn't want to, but I fear the bigger part will win. With my therapist out of the office for almost 1 month now, I really don't have anyone to talk to about it.

Well, you have us here. I used to self-harm somewhat, it took me a lot of practice to get to where I could ignore the urge to. Seems to me it's one of those things that the longer you can go without doing it, the easier it gets to not do it. Not that the urge goes away entirely- I still think about it every so often when I get triggered. But not having done it for so long, not doing it is manageable for me.

Snaga wrote:Well, you have us here. I used to self-harm somewhat, it took me a lot of practice to get to where I could ignore the urge to. Seems to me it's one of those things that the longer you can go without doing it, the easier it gets to not do it. Not that the urge goes away entirely- I still think about it every so often when I get triggered. But not having done it for so long, not doing it is manageable for me.

It's been about a year for me. A huge part of me, doesn't want to do it. But the urges are getting stronger every day.

If a person falls off the self-harm wagon, I see no reason to beat themselves up over it. But a year! Think about it. Would be a shame to break such a good streak...

When in the cycle of doing it it's awfully addictive, I know. I gave myself light burns- I've never been a cutter. And I also know at the time no other way of inflicting pain, such as the rubber band on the wrist, etc etc etc would satisfy- because it wasn't my thing. So I know how other things than a person's preferred method don't satisfy. But.... but but but... you've gone a year without. You have proved you don't need to do it. None of us do, we just get caught up in it. You've gone a year without; you can go a year more. Or a month. A week. A day. One day at a time. Don't self-harm just today. And then reset that clock every day. 'I will not self-harm.. today'

Snaga wrote:If a person falls off the self-harm wagon, I see no reason to beat themselves up over it. But a year! Think about it. Would be a shame to break such a good streak...

When in the cycle of doing it it's awfully addictive, I know. I gave myself light burns- I've never been a cutter. And I also know at the time no other way of inflicting pain, such as the rubber band on the wrist, etc etc etc would satisfy- because it wasn't my thing. So I know how other things than a person's preferred method don't satisfy. But.... but but but... you've gone a year without. You have proved you don't need to do it. None of us do, we just get caught up in it. You've gone a year without; you can go a year more. Or a month. A week. A day. One day at a time. Don't self-harm just today. And then reset that clock every day. 'I will not self-harm.. today'

Yeah I think I'll try the whole one day, because longer than that is too overwhelming. Thanks for the advice.

If you need to break it down smaller than that- hours or minutes, that's ok too. Whatever works for you in that moment.

lilyfairy wrote:If you need to break it down smaller than that- hours or minutes, that's ok too. Whatever works for you in that moment.

I've been having to go minute by minute. It's harder when I'm alone, which has been a lot lately. I finally was able to see my therapist last Wednesday, but with everything else that has been going on, I didn't even bring it up. Maybe I will be strong enough to bring it up next week.

I hope so, as well. About being able to talk to your therapist about it.

If you're up to it, and able, to be Not Alone, that would be good. I know my thinking processes get a little strange when I'm isolated from others- in the flesh, interacting with others online isn't the same.

Snaga wrote:I hope so, as well. About being able to talk to your therapist about it.

If you're up to it, and able, to be Not Alone, that would be good. I know my thinking processes get a little strange when I'm isolated from others- in the flesh, interacting with others online isn't the same.

Unfortunately, I can't avoid alone time. My husband works, and my brother (who is supposed to be here with me) leaves for hours at a time. I have asked him not to many times, but it's like he doesn't care.

You can't get out with friends or just- out? Wherever there are other people?