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Depression and suicide

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Depression and suicide

Postby paulohyp » Fri Aug 17, 2018 1:24 am

Hello everyone.

I’ve Been strugling with depression for the past 2 years.

Im 33 years old. I used to be the finance director of our family busines (auto parts), lived in a nice rented appartment, made good money (for brazilian standards), used to travel quite often.

I ended a relationship, and by observation, I got really sad with the perspective of getting older, being more mature, I really believe that the best part of my life was over. I was so bored with my life, I moved to Australia in 2016 in a student visa. Just worked 3 days a week, had class once a week, then started studing philosophy by myself.

I returned home (Brazil) january last year, and I dont do anything since.

I’m living in my parents house, I used to have a lot of friends, but I became antisocial. I really like my childhood friends, at least I like the image that I have of them when we were young. Now everybody have wives, children, and I find it nonsense.

I doubt any of them is happier now than when they were single.

It seems to me that marriage and having a family just brings responsabilities but no fun whatsoever.

I think I had a great life, but in the past 2 years its awful. I think about dying everyday, several times a day.

I used to be so anxious for the weekend to arrive, but now it’s pointless, since I don’t like doing stuff that I used to love, such as going out, hanging with my friends.

I take sleeping pills regularly, so I can diminish the time I’m awake.

I just ordered nembutal by some dealer in Ukraine. It’s on its way.

Im planning a farewell trip to ushuaia as soon I got the nembutal.

Gonna spend all my credit cards, hopefully I’ll have a one last good time
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Re: Depression and suicide

Postby Tanoujin » Mon Aug 20, 2018 2:15 pm

You realize you got a mental illness? Why do you want to throw your life away before you have tried to be cured? There is therapy, there is medication. There must be reasons for your ennui and sadness. Be aware of your options and choose wisely.
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Re: Depression and suicide

Postby Snaga » Tue Aug 21, 2018 2:55 am

Have you had any therapy for this?

Life is short- make of it what you can, while you can.

We do not delete posts.
Let it go.
Without (forum) rules, we all might as well be up in a tree flinging our crap at each other.
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Re: Depression and suicide

Postby Neverfeelaccepted » Sun Nov 25, 2018 3:03 am

I feel the same way about all my friends having wives and children. Find it nonsense too.

Though I never moved to a different country and could never do that myself so you have that to look proud of.

Your much better off than me.
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Re: Depression and suicide

Postby GIVEUP2019 » Sun Aug 18, 2019 6:44 pm

I really understand how u feel. I dont label it a mental illness I believe some of us were made for this world and some of us are not just like me.
If constant bad luck comes you way it must be a sign to say we weren't to be here.
I feel the same as u with weekends I absolutely dread them. Its just going round in cycles constantly. I have ben hurt by many people and been the one left to raise children on my own one who s disabled and my life has never settled. Everyday I cry and everyday I feel the same in my urge to end it. I have lost all motivation to be a mother no matter how much I love my kids. I smoke a lot of weed because I hate reality- when I haven't got it I sleep for days.
I dont want to come out the house anymore even to go shopping and when I do I get severe anxiety. I dont want to be here anymore but i dont know how to kill myself. I cut my wrists I have since a kid but its not doing the trick anymore because im to used to it... and to make matters worse I am a university student about to go into final year. I do not know how i have done it but I just know that if i was to loose uni i woud have nothing more to live for literally.
Point of this reply
I do understand you... and if you feel like your time here is done who is anybody to tell u different. Just makesure it is what u really want because there is no going back
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