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Dealing with OCD thoughts - my approach

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Dealing with OCD thoughts - my approach

Postby helloagain » Sun Feb 12, 2017 1:20 pm

First, avoid logic. No logic will work. It will simply make you ruminate and go round in circles.

Second, never look forward to a true or false answer. Everything in the world is fuzzy with a blurred border. OCDs typically obsess because they think everything is well defined and crisp. Nons on the other hand know that nothing is 100%. If you claim that you are a pure girl, you are lying. There will certainly be some boyish traits in every girl and some girlish traits in every boy. So ruminating about such things is sheer waste of time.

OCD makes you fixate on that 1% boyish trait so that you fear that you are 100% boy and you ask yourself "what if I am a boy in a girl's body?"

To beat OCD you must de-emphasize OCD doubts and accept that you have 1% boyish traits instead of thinking you have become a boy.

The same trick must be used for every doubt. Whenever you fear something contrary to your belief, don't either reject it nor accept it as 100% true. Accept it as 1% true even though OCD will have you fear it may be 100% true, which it NEVER is! That way you will be guilty of neither fight nor flight.

So my advice is: Accept every OCD thought UNHESITATINGLY as 1% true. For example if you get the thought "What if I am gay?", don't take it to mean "What if I am 100% gay?" as you usually do, for OCD never mentioned the extent. Rephrase it as "What if I am 1% gay?". Well, the answer is obvious: "Being 1% gay is no big deal. One can cope with it. In fact every straight person may be 1% gay without even knowing it!"

After all, OCD is your lifelong companion. It's not good to fight with lifelong companions. So let it have its way to the extent of 1% and make it happy :-)
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Re: Dealing with OCD thoughts - my approach

Postby dangdaniel » Wed Aug 29, 2018 6:42 pm

This was so helpful!
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Re: Dealing with OCD thoughts - my approach

Postby RottenFish » Thu Dec 20, 2018 11:35 am

Helloagain, this is absolutely the best OCD advice I've ever received.

I admit that my OCD brain rarely allows me to accept anything less than the 100% rule. For example, my car always has to be 100% clean and scratch-free. Unfortunately, I always obsess about the lint on the windows after I wash my car. Worse yet, I obsess about the small scratch in the front bumper. Even though the scratch in the front bumper has been painted over, it exists but only in my mind.

After using your technique, I have learned to focus on the 99% of my car that is lint and scratch-free.
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