by Roughdiamond » Sat Oct 06, 2012 1:28 pm
I was diagnosed with conversion disorder 10 months ago after my mother found me in the floor in my apartment unable to move. I was paralyzed for 2 weeks and although I regained most of my physical control after 2 months of physical therapy, I still struggle with vision problems, balance and coordination, and very poor memory/concentration. Sometimes, I feel like I am going blind and I am terrified about becoming paralyzed again. Since I have no idea what in the world caused it, I feel like it could happen again at any time. There were many symptoms leading up to that day I went into the hospital including 180/110 blood pressure, dizziness to the point where I ran into a wall at work, numbness/tingling, memory problems such as forgetting to use a pot holder to get something out of the stove (and I cook nearly every day) and I burned myself, I forgot my parents phone number, when they've had the same number for 21 years. I also was pumping gas one day leading up to being paralyzed and my vision was terrible and I hit my head on my car door trying to sit in the car and nearly had a concussion. I had a huge knot for 2 weeks. I still struggle at accepting this is all purely psychological. I have been in weekly therapy sessions for 3 months now, but don't feel the slightest bit better. On my MRI, they found an arachnoid cyst that was on the part of my brain that affects vision and memory and another suspicious cyst at the base of my brain that is the part that controls balance and coordination and movement. All neurologists, doctors, optomostrists agreed that they were benign though, thus diagnosing me with conversion disorder. I, said all of that just to say that I too would like to know where are all these people that supposedly improve when the doctor tells you your diagnosis? I have found statistics that say 50% of people diagnosed also have a coconcurring neurological problem. And that 25% of people relapse within a year. I, just don't think many people know too much about this other than what the textbook tells them and I wish that if there were people out there who have recovered or were helped by psychotherapy and whatnot, that they would come forward and give hope to the rest of us. I feel like I will constantly live in fear for myself and my family because of this diagnosis.
Borderline Personality Disorder
Conversion Disorder
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
Depression/Anxiety
Currently, no medications.