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I thought I was alone

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I thought I was alone

Postby DarkRyder13 » Tue Dec 02, 2014 4:06 am

I cannot tell you how good it is to know that I am not alone in this. I have never met anyone else with Conversion Disorder. I have been dealing with this for 14 years now, and I felt as if no one understood me.

My first episode came while I was in the Army stationed in Okinawa, Japan. I was in a Special Forces unit and we went to Thailand for a 3week training mission. The day I retuned, I reunited with my family, and went to bed around 10:00pm, only to wake about 2 hours later. I was shaking uncontrollably, had severe pains in the back of my neck, an uncontrollable switch in my right arm, weakness in my legs, arms and hands, and a severe stutter speech. I also kept blacking out, but could hear everything going on around me. My wife rushed me to the Naval Hospital where I was seen in the emergency room. After some extreme horrible treatment, I was admitted to the hospital. All the test, X-rays, cat scans, blood test, urine and stool test, spinal tap and MRI came back normal. My next trip was to neurology, where the doctor saw me for all of 5 minutes, looked me in my face and told me "This is not a nuerology problem, your are crazy and need to go to mental health". Before I could protest, I was wheeled out of his office with tears in my eyes. An hour later I was seen by a psychiatrist who told me I have Somataform Disoder, later changed to a more specific diagnosis of Conversion Disorder.
For the next 14 years I have been having episodes, lasting for several days of the exact same symptoms. They come and they go, some days I'm completely normal, which can change at any moment. I have had many doctors treat me as if I have two heads, but only a very few that seemed to have some sense of compassion. I am currently on several types of depression and anxiety medications and seeing a therapist.
I can go on and on about my experiences, but I'll spare you the details. I am just so elated to have a group,I can talk to, who understands.
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