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From BFF to IdontKnowYou

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From BFF to IdontKnowYou

Postby Elif87 » Sat Mar 21, 2020 11:09 am

Hi everybody,

I´m new to this forum and I hope I found the right topic for my problems, as my english is not the best. But I couldn´t find the right forum in my language and also were afraid that the person I´m talking about could find herself in my sentences. So please, if I chose the wrong position for my question, correct me!

Why I chose this area "cognitive beh..." is because I started to go to this kind of therapy but unfortunately my therapist got health problems and must close her ordination, so I´m more or less left by myself.

What I need now? I need a strategy to go through my problems right now, escpecially now because I somehow lost my best friend and I really don´t know how it happend. She said I changed but I don´t more She just says that I don´t understand and that I wasn´t there for you like she was for me, when I was pregnant. When she was pregnant I got a baby which was then 3 months old and a daughter of 6 yrs and I´m studying. So I guess I couldn´t organize as much time as she could when I was pregnant, she had no job to that moment... Ya, and the worst about it is, that we had a person we both hated so much - my sister in law, and BOTH of us were talking about her really really bad, because she really is mean... but that doesn´t matter now. So, my Ex-BFF is now friends with her, and it really really feels so bad. Not just because you lost your friend to someone who is actually your enemy, also because she knows everything I said about her. EVERYTHING. I´m really afraid what coudl happen. She is the wife of my husbands brother, and if she somehow finds out what I talked about her - my parens in law , my brother in law, everybody would hate me, although everything is the truth I said. I never said anything which wasn´t. But anyways, it´s not nice and I really hate my self for that and I really regret that I talked about her. But I really can´t understand why they are friends now, how did this happen. I mean, she even hated her more than I did. And also my sister in law didn´t liked her as well. What happend there, how?

SO, my problem now is. I can´t change anything about it, but I really feel so bad about it. How can I now work on myself so that this doesn´t make me crazy anymore.
To talk to my ex-bff I already tried, it didn´t work. She just says that I wasn´t reacting like she expected and that I don´t understand. I tried to write her message, sometimes she answered, but very shortly sometimes she didn´t even respond so I gave up on this.
Now, I really don´t know what to do. I don´t know how to talk to her when I see her and also when I see my sister in law because I don´t know if she knows what I talked about her.

My stomack hurts, I can´t sleep. I mean, this is now my only issue, but this is the actual one, so want to get rid of this first and then work on the other things.

Thanks to corona the chance to see anyone is very small, but also this will end some day.

Thank you
Elif87
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