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why are my eating habits so messed up?

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why are my eating habits so messed up?

Postby thecrystalgems » Sun Jan 08, 2017 3:04 pm

ever since i was a kid i have been a very picky eater. it was strange because it wasn't like i had the luxury of choice when it came to food, but i rarely could bring myself to eat what we had. i'm almost 19 now and it's the same. i can't eat cereal or most breakfast foods (excepting eggs and bacon), i can't eat most fruits or vegetables, and i can only stomach a few specific sandwiches. i can eat most meats, but seafood has always made me feel sick despite having only taken maybe a few bites of salmon in my whole life. my current diet consists almost entirely of symphony bars (which has been my favorite candy bar my whole life) and water. sometimes i have pizza at work, or i'll grab something from a fast food place. i've lost almost 40 lbs since the summer without meaning to, and oftentimes i forget to eat. i've gone days without eating at all. the majority of the time i only eat once a day. none of this is purposeful. i don't know why i can't eat like a normal person. my dad tells me i used to like cereal and bananas and things before he and my mom got divorced. after i "started" getting picky my dad would force me to eat foods that i didn't like and that would make me yucky inside. he forced me to eat mushed up bananas, he forced me to eat french toast when i stopped being able to eat it, he forced me to eat rice after i put too much ketchup on it and it burned my mouth. he would yell at me and wouldn't let me leave the table until i did. i was also neglected by my mom later in my life and the only way i could eat was if i collected change and got candy from the vending machines at school or if i stole bags of chocolate from the store. i still don't know why i stopped liking so many things, but i think those things may have definitely reinforced it. all i know now is my eating is very disordered.
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