Our partner

Abusive parent

Open Discussions About Child Abuse

Moderators: seabreezeblue, quietgirl2538, Terry E.

Forum rules
You are entering a forum that contains discussions of abuse, some of which are explicit in nature. The topics discussed may be triggering to some people. Please be aware of this before entering this forum.

Abusive parent

Postby bilbo012 » Wed May 15, 2019 8:54 am

Hi

I'm new to the forum, and need a bit of help.

My dad has always been argumentative and hot-tempered. This is made worse when he's had a drink. He has called me names and made horrible comments about me (e.g. my weight, my intelligence etc) and it has gone on as long as I can remember.

Recently I had finished a job contract and moved back in with my parents. Since then he's made comments about why I haven't got a job yet (I have been on several interviews), why can't I just go to the job centre and get a bar job, why am I spending money if I'm not earning etc. Last night, he asked if I was pissed (I had a few drinks yes, but was sitting quietly and not making a show) and then started shouting about not having a job, and that I am being snobby about getting a bar job (I have a PhD, and would be far too overqualified) and why I haven't got a job with my 'fancy qualification'. Then my mum came and stood up for me, and my dad tried to act the victim saying 'yet again I'm the villian' as if everyone was attacking him

I'm caught between a rock and a hard place; up until now, I have kept my dad at arms length to protect myself. Now I can't get away so easily from his abuse
bilbo012
Consumer 0
Consumer 0
 
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed May 15, 2019 8:38 am
Local time: Fri May 24, 2019 2:57 pm
Blog: View Blog (0)


ADVERTISEMENT

Re: Abusive parent

Postby quietgirl2538 » Sun May 19, 2019 9:36 am

Hi bilbo012 and welcome to Psych Forums...

I'm really sorry to hear you're going through such verbal abuse from your dad. I used to go through that with my mom. So, I understand the feeling. I would try my best, back in my teenage years, to not be home when she was there. It's hard to do, I know. I hope you get a job really soon. I know that's important for you and it's not always so easy to do.
“There’s an Asian expression that ‘a burden shared is halved.’"

(Please contact another Moderator)



Forum Rules

PsychForum rules and Active Staff
quietgirl2538
Moderator: Consumer
Moderator: Consumer
 
Posts: 5537
Joined: Sat Feb 16, 2013 2:23 am
Local time: Fri May 24, 2019 9:57 am
Blog: View Blog (89)

Re: Abusive parent

Postby Terry E. » Wed May 22, 2019 3:32 am

I agree with quiet .. and another thing that worked for me was having something else in my life, some other interest so that after such interaction I did not ruminate on it but could mentally distract myself/ escape to happier thoughts.

Also remind yourself this is not forever..
Terry E.
Moderator: Consumer
Moderator: Consumer
 
Posts: 1618
Joined: Wed Aug 28, 2013 2:22 am
Local time: Fri May 24, 2019 2:57 pm
Blog: View Blog (1)


Return to Child Abuse Forum




  • Related articles
    Replies
    Views
    Last post

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests