I've asked many people this question. My brother was on meth and heroine for 15+ years. He relapsed last week after stresses he could not cope with got to him, a job(85k/year) he hated, coming home to an emotionally unavailable with wife who went to alcohol when she quit her job 5 years ago to take care of their new child who is now 6, with his three kids all by that same woman who dealt with the same addiction problems he dealt with since he they were kids, 2 teenage boys. Stresses from all sides, he relapsed last week. Last night he set himself on fire and jumped off their one story house on an already broken ankle, then went to putting cigarettes out on himself.
We are a supportive family. I'm 25 getting my masters in geology. He's 43. And I can't understand why someone would light themselves on fire and be so destructive. It's not a suicide attempt. I think he is begging for help.