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What are the chances he’ll come back?

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What are the chances he’ll come back?

Postby baccab » Thu Nov 21, 2019 10:57 am

I broke up with my partner over him ignoring me/avoiding our scheduled plans. I sent some pretty mean messages and he blocked me that night without saying a word to me. Once I calmed down, I reached out to his friends/family to check on his well-being as I was concerned. That’s when he finally contacted me and apologised but said he needed me not to contact him for a ‘little while’ as he was going through mental/family issues and that life was weird for him. I did keep texting him most days after that, and he would often engage back in conversation. Mostly just me apologising for what I did, and asking him to return my things if he didn’t want to be with me.

A while later, I had asked him if he was seeing someone else/had cheated on me to which he denied and then indicated him being annoyed at me texting him after I said I’d give him space. That was the last I heard from him and that was over a month ago. I’ve since made more of an effort to give him space (only texting once a week - I was codependent on him with abandonment issues and why I broke up with him in the first place)

I deeply regret pushing him away and have expressed that to him. He hasn’t acknowledged our argument or our breakup but has replied about other stuff.

I’m very confused but I still want to make this work with him. Is it a lost cause?
We had a very short relationship but a very, very intense/caring/loving one. Throughout our relationship, he would often isolate/disappear for weeks at a time but this is the longest he’s gone without talking to me. I’m very scared he’ll never speak to me again. The only thing he’s said to me during our split is that he ‘couldnt access his feelings right now’ then a day later said he still had feelings for me. He said he would talk to me soon and expressed a possibility of him staying over at my place but that was over a month ago and not a word since.

I’m aiming to give him 2 weeks of space before checking in again with another light message, which is what I’ve been doing all month. Once light message a week

Is there anything else I can do?
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Re: What are the chances he’ll come back?

Postby Remember Ronni » Tue Dec 03, 2019 3:16 pm

Honestly you need to stop texting him.

Now I say this as someone who didn't and ended up being arrested for harassment of their ex partner.

Right now this is all encompassing for you. But carrying on as you are might end up getting you arrested. It will only push him further away. He asked you to stop contacting him. So respect his wishes and stop. Let him miss you.

Will he come back? Who knows? Probably not, in all honesty but keep going like this and you will put him off you for good.

I am sorry if that sounds a bit blunt, but I am talking from some experience on this. He hasn't forgotten who you are. He doesn't need constant reminders. Think Bunny Boiler. Don't be that girl. It is agony but this will not bring him back. Give him space. And hope. But don't keep contacting him, it won't help.
Diagnosed with Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder (BPD)
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