To grow as a person. To grow as a woman.
I am lucky enough to admit that my life has been very good these last few months. I am doing great being single. I am single but I am looking for my Mr. Right. There are still millions or maybe in the billions, of men who are available out in this great ocean of the world. I am single. I'm looking ahead to the future. Of encountering Love. Isn't that what makes the world go round. Love. If we are so lucky to find it.
I'm 49. My youngest daughter told me today that I look 45. That I don't look 50. That was so sweet. She is so honest with me at times that it hurts, so for her to tell me this, means it's the truth. Lol. I love my girls. They know it. And I am happy. In all aspects of that word.
It's been 9 months that my heart was broken. I'm ok, for a long while now. My heart has healed and I'm single again. As in I am truly available in my heart, if there were a real love entering my life, I am ready for it. I was like this at one time. Ready for love. When my heart is broken, it needed to heal before I was ready to move on. I healed and I am brand new. I have a clean slate. There is that desiring and believing in the beauty of things that was gone when my heart was broken.
I am seeing a man, but we are not serious. He doesn't want to ever get serious. I am ok with that. So that is why I am in all honesty, open to love. He is a friend, but that is all. I think he is good-looking, a good man, but he is not for me. Why? Because for there to be a relationship, there needs to be a mutual self-giving from both parties. There is friendship on both of our parts. No more. I don't give of myself, and I am ok with that. I continue to look. Another guy likes me, F. But he lives long-distance. I won't do long-distance relationships. It's what hurt my first relationship with G when I was 21. It was too hard on me. I go from there in looking for a good man.
<3
My bipolar has been ok all of these years since at least 2018. I've been stable and on meds that help me. I sleep enough each night, I try to eat well, and I take my meds. At this time, I work a full-time job with little ones in ages of 3-4 years of age. It's Pre-K ages. I am a full-time paraprofessional for almost 2 years now. When I entered the workforce, it was in 2019 and it was so daunting and hard. I'm doing really good now. I won't complain. Lol. I'll treasure these moments of bliss. There is no malice in my heart, only peace and goodwill toward all. Yes, I am very blessed. <3