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peaceismyrushmore
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Joined: Sun Sep 08, 2013 7:46 am
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- October 2014
If I was GOD for a day
   Sun Oct 26, 2014 3:14 am

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If I was GOD for a day

Permanent Linkby peaceismyrushmore on Sun Oct 26, 2014 3:14 am

I'd burn this POS world to the ground and boil the oceans. FTW

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March

Permanent Linkby peaceismyrushmore on Sun Mar 16, 2014 8:06 am

well, winter is still here and me getting stuck a few times is reasonable. We got about 8" the other day and I drove down many unplowed roads without getting stuck. The depression is bad. I still work midnights but I may have a job interview (face to face) next week. I already had a phone interview. A day shift job. Today is Sunday and I have so many things a normal person would do, to do. But I work that f'ing Midnight shift so I have to sleep. I live in a different world. I am a veteran and I have a VA apt on Mon. I have to say, the VA is a real lifeline to me. It is hard to have to do that extra driving and miss sleep, but it is worth it. I don't know why I can't let go of memories of 1992. The USMC and also a person that meant so much to me. It seems everyone always wants things from me, but most aren't giving much in return. Take take take, take take take, I am getting to old for this. My body is getting tired. I want more pain meds for my chronic pain but am afraid of being labeled a drug addict. I am gonna work on getting this new job, I think it will be a lot less physical and 100% less BS then the job I have now.

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another great day

Permanent Linkby peaceismyrushmore on Sat Jan 25, 2014 6:16 am

well the heavy winds and blowing snow caused giant snow drifts and a POS truck blocked the private lane I live on. I work midnights and I wanted to get to work. So....I had this great idea....I'd drive my Escape (with 4X4) through the yard to my neighbors driveway which is another way to the main road. Well, now I am completely stuck in my yard. 1) I forgot how far it is to his driveway and the snow was to deep + ice. And I need better tires. I think I have 100% street tires. I really really really hate to call in. I did call when I first saw that god-damn truck stuck in my way, BUT it wasn't 1 hour prior to start of shift so I will get written up. If I had been tardy I would have been OK. So the story of my life in a nutshell. 1) way out blocked, 2) failed to get out the only other way 3) worked superhard on #2 and still failed 4) will be punished for missing work and now I am f-cking frozen and my back is screaming. This is the kind of this that usually would get me in a super rage and I'd berate myself (even though I did my best) because I failed. lately it is like I am just numb. I am just sinking deeper and deeper into an ocean of depression. The only lifeline I have is my kids, I have to keep going for them.

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1 out of 52 out of 53 out of 54 out of 55 out of 5

world is very punitive

Permanent Linkby peaceismyrushmore on Tue Jan 07, 2014 8:11 am

I have a very bad view of things probably. I internalize about everything. At work, if the company won't work on fix my machine I feel that they are punishing me. I can't shake that feeling. I hate my ######6 job. But in MI, there are not many good jobs anymore. Ones that are full time and have benefits, so I tolerate all the BS. I guess the DOW rising doesn't really affect the 99%. I have been treated so harshly my whole life I just want to lash out. And I do often. My anger and attitude has been causing me a lot of problems. I am in therapy and I am on meds. One day at a time I say to myself.

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working all night

Permanent Linkby peaceismyrushmore on Sat Dec 28, 2013 12:51 pm

not mania, I work midnights and I am off. Gotta keep my cool, keep my cool, keep my cool, keep my cool, keep my cool, keep my cool, keep my cool, keep my cool, keep my cool, keep my cool, keep my cool, keep my cool, keep my cool. The science of ###$

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