Well a few years have past by now. We did have some set backs that almost propelled life over the cliff but we did learn a lot in that process.
My son did recover from his BDD. He still has some residual concerns but they don't bother him as much as they do me.
His life did fall over though. The girl of his dreams turned out not to be. In fact she had vastly more problems than he. With a child in the mix he had to head for the law courts. No sane person should ever go there. What takes place there would kill off the most sane of us given enough exposure. The experience of the legal system brought us to our knees. Medications were increased to help him cope but ultimately no one could cope. We had to turn back and let the child go. The mother could accomplish her desired international child abduction with the robust approval of the judiciary.
This situation is not a light load to have to carry.
I had learnt the importance of emotional guidance by this stage. So I was practicing changing thoughts to others more wanted and writing them on the white board I had placed on the fridge. When he was crying, I asked him what the thought was, he was just now thinking. He would tell me and together we would try and create a make peace thought to counter it. He had to come to the place where he was free to start over with improved understanding of how he needed to be actively managing his thinking.
I can't say he has reached that place. Learning to bring awareness to thought and how it feels is a new skill most of us have never learnt. We never understood the need. The rollercoaster of emotions that is typically the lot of all BDDers is still present. I just have to try and sell him the message that he does have full control over them. It takes recognizing that he does have thought choice and can direct his thinking to what truly feels best to think. Guidance is always coming in the form of emotion. You just have to care more about how you feel. If you feel bad stop..it is that thought now that has to be tweeked. Find relief by tuning into your own wisdom. Hopefully we can get off this bus at this stop. We can learn this skill of letting emotions guide our thinking. If it doesn't feel good it isn't good. Wish you well. Marg