went to the drugs counseling today and got wound up. ive been clean 9 months but they have put me with a councilor who is supposed to keep you on the right path. he suggested a group session with other people who have similar past. i asked how many bipolar transgender hiv there were and he took it a bad way. i told him i stopped drugs because i wanted to so attending a group with people who are struggling was not helpful. but the most important thing was i told him i dont do groups. its not a maybe thing there is nothing on this earth will make me attend one. i told him but he kept on trying to pursued me. i told him one last time to stop pressing it as he would cause me to walk away from everything. he seemed put off and cut the session short. i didnt go there for drugs support i had already stopped it was because mental health wanted me drugs tested. he has alienated himself towards me in that he couldnt see i went very serious but yet he carried on.im glad he stopped the session i was ready to walk out or throw him out the window.i told him the truth that if i used drugs again then him or the whole of his team wouldnt stop me i will be on self destruct mode and wont talk to them.
im re thinking the help ive got and wondering if its helping or im just scared of what they will do if i dont attend. i dont know if i will see him again i dont think we are on the same wave length and now i dont like him.my problems are not what they deal with. i have no ongoing drug issues and now they have said they cant see a reason for further drug testing i dont see any point going. havnt been this upset in a long time it really hit a nerve.